Problems with Thai girlfriends

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oakdale160
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Re: Problems with Thai girlfriends

Post by oakdale160 » Mon Aug 29, 2016 8:30 am

I think that you could take RCers letter and change the last word to Canada, US, Australia or any other western cou
ntry and it would be equally true.

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Re: Problems with Thai girlfriends

Post by blahblah » Sat Oct 01, 2016 1:36 am

expat71NL wrote:We are guests. We are living in Thailand for our own pleasure. None of us have been asked to come here.
Although I agree a little about "compromise" it has to be remembered that if you decide to live in one of the two countries then the culture of the land of abode has to be very dominant.
This behaviour has nothing to do with culture ... or do all Thai women treat their men in such a manner ?

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Re: Problems with Thai girlfriends

Post by handdrummer » Sat Oct 01, 2016 5:13 am

you'll never be from anywhere except where you've been raised. you can learn the language, adopt the customs, have friends and you still won't be accepted as being from your adopted country. it's true even within a country. the bangkokians disparage the southerners, and upcountry people, in the u.s. it's the south vs. everywhere else, every country I've lived in (8) is the same in that aspect.

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Re: Problems with Thai girlfriends

Post by oakdale160 » Sat Oct 01, 2016 9:36 am

"if it flies, floats or fu***, rent, don't buy'

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Re: Problems with Thai girlfriends

Post by pharvey » Mon Oct 03, 2016 1:45 pm

blahblah wrote:This behaviour has nothing to do with culture ... or do all Thai women treat their men in such a manner ?
Actually, culture is a huge thing - and a massive difference between Asian and Western Countries. No, not all Thai women treat their men in the same manner, as not all Chinese or Japanese or Malay or Philippine... How about your culture vs Asian?

"blahblah" seems appropriate....

:cheers: :cheers:
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Re: Problems with Thai girlfriends

Post by lovedogs » Mon Oct 03, 2016 5:02 pm

Hey Mate,

I totally hear you and empathise with you. I have a similar situation, although she hasnt locked me in. In fact she is living in our restaurant. But by god if I dare venture out for a beer, she knows about it and calls me constantly all night (i dont answer) abusing me no end. In my eyes we are done! Same I have tried to communicate with her, her english was quite good. She didnt want to converse at all, enjoy anything we did together, has never once thanked me for anything. Has a temper like you wouldnt believe and I wouldnt put it past her to stab anyone. She has threatened to cut my throat on several occasions if I wander. I'm not scared but it sooooo frustrating. Just hoping there are some nice girls out there who love you the person, not the wallett.

As far as advice I would leave her, no matter how many times you try and spell out the differences she wont either a) understand or doesnt want to understand.

Good luck mate

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Re: Problems with Thai girlfriends

Post by Bristolian » Mon Oct 03, 2016 5:58 pm

pharvey wrote:
blahblah wrote:This behaviour has nothing to do with culture ... or do all Thai women treat their men in such a manner ?
Actually, culture is a huge thing - and a massive difference between Asian and Western Countries. No, not all Thai women treat their men in the same manner, as not all Chinese or Japanese or Malay or Philippine... How about your culture vs Asian?

"blahblah" seems appropriate....

:cheers: :cheers:
Agree 100% :cheers:

Thai culture and tradition have a huge role to play in the reasons why Thai women can often display distrust for their boyfriends/husbands.

It had widely been accepted, in Thai male culture, that men will have various levels of "lady friends" and very casual sexual partners. You only need to look at the Thai vocabulary to see the various levels; Mia Noi, Fan, GF, Gik etc.

More modern, better informed or better educated Thai ladies are much less tolerant of this behavior and will react accordingly in a very different way than their mother or grandmother would have done.

The reaction will often come from a previous broken relationship, with a boyfriend or husband and can even develop much earlier from broken relationships of parents and close family members.
"'The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why." - Mark Twain

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Re: Problems with Thai girlfriends

Post by Three » Mon Oct 03, 2016 7:14 pm

expat71NL wrote:We are guests. We are living in Thailand for our own pleasure. None of us have been asked to come here.
You have a funny definition for "guest". At my house, a guest does not pay.

Most of us are customers in Thailand. And if we don't get our money's worth, or we are poorly treated, cheated, insulted, discriminated against, threatened, and all the other typical Thailand crap, we are well within our rights to say so.

For chrissake: Man up.

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Re: Problems with Thai girlfriends

Post by HHTel » Mon Oct 03, 2016 11:23 pm

Just repeating my earlier post.
Regarding 'guests'. A guest is a person who is invited, welcomed and treated accordingly. There are several definitions both as a noun and other parts of a sentence. None of them fit the situation. Check it out.

We are not invited, not welcomed (by the authorities not the general public) and certainly not treated as guests. Yes, we choose to live here which is far different from being invited. To live here we have to jump through various hoops as most people know. We contribute to the Thai economy and are looked on as a necessary evil. We have to report every 90 days as if we are on parole. The powers that be can eject any one of us on a whim! There's a saying 'When in Rome do as the Romans do'. As a foreigner try doing as the Thais do and see what happens. We are allowed to stay under sufferance providing we abide by the rules which cover dual-pricing, cash handouts and many other discriminatory rules. Hotels have 'paying guests'. We are more of a paying tenant with a temporary lease. Break the conditions of your lease and you're out! In the UK, for example, after 4 years stay, you are invited to apply for British citizenship along with a British passport.

Would you treat your guests in such a way?

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Re: Problems with Thai girlfriends

Post by RCer » Tue Oct 04, 2016 12:20 pm

Its interesting to see the word guest used.

In my home any guest that gets drunk and acts the fool, demands anything, talks down to anyone, treats anyone like a servant, etc, will quickly be shown the door.

Why should things be any different elsewhere?

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Re: Problems with Thai girlfriends

Post by Three » Tue Oct 04, 2016 4:17 pm

RCer wrote:In my home any guest that gets drunk and acts the fool, demands anything, talks down to anyone, treats anyone like a servant, etc, will quickly be shown the door.
Goodness. I shan't be coming to your home!
Last edited by Three on Tue Oct 04, 2016 4:35 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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Re: Problems with Thai girlfriends

Post by Three » Tue Oct 04, 2016 4:23 pm

Anyway, to the OP and the 100s of thousands of others involved in an unhappy relationship with a Thai woman:

East is East and West is West - and never the twain shall meet.

Be thankful (if) she hasn't snipped off your Johnson. Yet.

And always keep in mind: Thai women are still often cheaper, more fun, and waaaay better looking than Western women. And they may even introduce you to their husbands. When you've run out of money.

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Re: Problems with Thai girlfriends

Post by aragon » Tue Oct 04, 2016 5:21 pm

RCer wrote:Its interesting to see the word guest used.

In my home any guest that gets drunk and acts the fool, demands anything, talks down to anyone, treats anyone like a servant, etc, will quickly be shown the door.

Why should things be any different elsewhere?
Totally agree, however as has been eloquently pointed out by a number of posters, expats are anything but guests in the LOS and are only just about tolerated as a necessary evil source of finance, even when they behave impeccably and kowtow at every opportunity :banghead: :banghead:
“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.” Sir Winston Churchill

Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves.
After marriage, the 'Y' becomes silent.

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Re: Problems with Thai girlfriends

Post by Khundon1975 » Wed Oct 05, 2016 12:16 am

I never have any trouble with the girlfriend, it's the wife I have trouble with.
:wink:
I've lost my mind and I am making no effort to find it.

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Re: Problems with Thai girlfriends

Post by migrant » Wed Oct 05, 2016 5:20 am

Khundon1975 wrote:I never have any trouble with the girlfriend, it's the wife I have trouble with.
:wink:
Mrs M makes sure I don't have problems with girlfriends!!
The essence of life lies with the dispensing with of formalities

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