Correct Way to Propose?

[RCer]

Never thought I'd be in the position to pop the question again, but happily I am.

I want to do it right. In the US its easy in that regard.

My gf is pretty traditional. Not into flamboient things and such.

Should I ask her over a nice dinner someplace or in private?

How about the ring? Do Thai's do that sort of thing? Personally, I'd prefer letting her pick the ring if she wants one.

Do Thai's prefer a long engagement or short?

Any input other than the usual "don't do it" would be appreciated.

[usual suspect]

Ask her if you can go 'up country' & meet/stay a while at her family home..if your ladys says OK, & you do indeed go stay at the family home..it is seen as if she has invited you there, & that you'll actually be 'on parade' somewhat.
Many times after this initial stay then the parents may assume YOU are the one for their daughter...
...then she how SHE handles things after this 1st family visit..??

[VincentD]

Tend to go with US opinion. When you marry a Thai, you marry the family. If you cant get along with the family it will be a very rocky road ahead...
Would help if you can speak the language or at least understand it so you will have an idea of what will be going on around you...

BTW... Good luck

[layalshafee]

How to propose to a thai:

Step 1. Don't

[brianks]

I guess I was lucky. My "girlfriend" gave me a one year free trial deal. After one year went by it was be married or be gone. After exactly one year that is what happened and I have been happily married now for over 7 years.

[RCer]

I went with the old fashioned western version and just asked over dinner. No fanfare. She said yes.

[dalmatiandave]

I guess I was lucky. My "girlfriend" gave me a one year free trial deal. After one year went by it was be married or be gone. After exactly one year that is what happened and I have been happily married now for over 7 years.

Happy it worked out for you but I can't relate at all to your trial period.

If a girl said to me after a year marry me or I am gone it would most likely be a case of 'next' as marriage is not something to take lightly and certainly not based on one person's criteria.

Love doesn't give one person the right to demand marriage or else 'out you go'. Strange but obviously worked if this is the what 'love' means for you.

Suppose it takes all sorts.

Must say though proposing must have been boring as her response was already known. Did you do it at exactly a year, god forbid you missed it by a day and your bags had been packed waiting at the door.

[Pleng]

Well love is a man made concept, so it means something different to everybody; obviously influenced by religion, parental upbringing and how many hollywood movies you may have seen whilst growing up.

I remember I saw a quote somewhere recently (sorry don't remember where) which I found amusing. It was questioning the concept of marriage as a bizzare one and went along the lines of "I love you so much that I'm going to get the government involved so you can't leave me. WTF"... Made me smile anyway.

I don't think brianks will have been the first person to know the outcome of a proposal before asking, and I doubt there are too many people on this forum who have been turned down, anyway.

Congrats to RCer, by the way

[Spitfire]

Only go as far as you can walk away from in a day or two if it does a 180.

I have been married 15 years here and if it went 'tits-up' for any kind of reason, doesn't matter whether due to me/my wife/Thailand changing/politics or whatever...I can still comfortably walk away without it being a mess...wife would benefit but I'd be OK too.