Squat Toilets gotta love em(not)

[crazy88]

Sloosh down first leaving a dry area of floor

Shoes off, trousers or shorts off standing on dry patch, hang trousers on door handle, shoes back on.

Approach the receptacle and finish business. If no handle? brace preferred arm on wall, lean forwards a little to avoid falling backwards especially when inebriated.

If no squirtgun then a bowl will be within arms reach but check first before commencing, also check pressure of squirtgun prior.

Reverse process with apparell and Robert is your mothers brother

Crazy 88

[hhfarang]

also check pressure of squirtgun prior

Roger that! I (accidentally) gave myself an enema with one in a Bangkok hotel room last year. It could have been used to clean sandwash!

Then found a little valve at the base near the wall and toned it down a bit. I guess the previous occupant liked their spray on rough side.

[dtaai-maai]

Yes, a high pressure squirt can be jolly painful when accidentally pointed in a testicular direction...



Love this thread!

[migrant]

Still can't figure it out.

I know the first time I use one I'll look like I went over a waterfall

[Frank Hovis]

The major benefit of the squatter over the sitter is that you don't need to touch anything someone elses butt has been on.
What I find disturbing about squatters with a scoop is that there is always the question of 'Is there anything left behind that shouldn't be?'
With a butt spray there's little doubt, as mentioned earlier some of them are set to cleanse you inside and out and an accidental overspray to the back of the sack can be a shock, but with the scoop I always feel that I haven't quite got the technique for the water to run over the places the water should run with sufficient force or volume.
Not forgetting too that our western butts are probably (speculation here) a bit more hirsuit than your typical Thai butt.

Anyone in the UK wanting a bit of practice before they come over should go to Rochdale http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-ma ... r-10644118 although they look like Japanese squatters to me.

[hhfarang]

hirsuit

Got me with that one Frank! Although I guessed from context what it meant I had to look it up to be sure. I've never seen or heard that word before... never to old to learn something!

[wpcoe]

Now this may knock down the smugness of the bum gun brigade (and probably gross everybody out), but a friend "in the business" told me that bar girls and boys will use the bum gun as a makeshift enema if they anticipate anal sex: they actually insert the nozzle head up the toward the sphincter and use low pressure.

Of course, in my sick little mind, I asked what about the girls using it as a douche, and there was an eye roll as if to say, "of course, your moron!"

Think about *that* the next time you use a bum gun in, say, a hotel room...

[barrys]

hirsuit

Got me with that one Frank! Although I guessed from context what it meant I had to look it up to be sure. I've never seen or heard that word before... never to old to learn something!

... though it is actually spelled "hirsute"

[traveller2]

Heres a little story from my first visit to Thailand.

On our way down the highway to HH we stopped at a rest stop for the toilets.
I went in, saw the squat toilets and proceeded to position myself (bearing in mind I had never seen let alone used one before). Sort of got myself in what I assumed was a good position when it all went wrong! Feet slipped from under me, arse in the hole, both hands on the wet floor and oaths being uttered (you get my drift?).
Anyway, that sort of took the whole idea out of my head. I got up in about 3 milliseconds (as you would), pulled my clothes up and rather sheepishly walked out of the stall.
Outside were 2 thai gents, smiling broadly as I passed, which just dented my pride even more. I can guess what they were thinking.
Luckily I can laugh at myself and my wife was laughing all the way to HH when I told her.
To make things worse, we stopped at the same rest stop later in that holiday and there are some western style toilets which I hadnt seen on my first visit.

So people, beware of wet slippery floors when in this type of toilet.

I hope you enjoyed my experience and I hope it has given you a laugh as it has us.

t2

[BaaBaa.]

Now this may knock down the smugness of the bum gun brigade (and probably gross everybody out), but a friend "in the business" told me that bar girls and boys will use the bum gun as a makeshift enema if they anticipate anal sex: they actually insert the nozzle head up the toward the sphincter and use low pressure.

Of course, in my sick little mind, I asked what about the girls using it as a douche, and there was an eye roll as if to say, "of course, your moron!"

Think about *that* the next time you use a bum gun in, say, a hotel room...

Not sure if serious.

[Frank Hovis]

That's the last time I'll be using it as a cheap alternative to a water jet tooth pick in restaurants !!!

[Piesat42]

For a really good laugh (not) you should try using one when your 75% disabled and use crutches to get about! Quite chuffed with myself after using my first ever one in a restaurant in Nawa and not dropping everything in my trousers

[Takiap]

With a butt spray there's little doubt, as mentioned earlier some of them are set to cleanse you inside and out and an accidental overspray to the back of the sack can be a shock, but with the scoop I always feel that I haven't quite got the technique for the water to run over the places the water should run with sufficient force or volume.

Frank...........using a bum spray is a one hand operation, whereas with the scoop full of water method, it's a two hands operation. I afraid mate, you're going to have to get that left hand of yours dirty

[Takiap]

Now this may knock down the smugness of the bum gun brigade (and probably gross everybody out), but a friend "in the business" told me that bar girls and boys will use the bum gun as a makeshift enema if they anticipate anal sex: they actually insert the nozzle head up the toward the sphincter and use low pressure.

Of course, in my sick little mind, I asked what about the girls using it as a douche, and there was an eye roll as if to say, "of course, your moron!"

Think about *that* the next time you use a bum gun in, say, a hotel room...

My guess is, your friend is talking crap. In fact, I know he is since the Thais are far too concerned with personal hygiene to stick a public bum spray into a place where the sun don't shine. You'll hear plenty of equally absurd tales the longer you stay here.

[margaretcarnes]

With a butt spray there's little doubt, as mentioned earlier some of them are set to cleanse you inside and out and an accidental overspray to the back of the sack can be a shock, but with the scoop I always feel that I haven't quite got the technique for the water to run over the places the water should run with sufficient force or volume.

Frank...........using a bum spray is a one hand operation, whereas with the scoop full of water method, it's a two hands operation. I afraid mate, you're going to have to get that left hand of yours dirty

Right there Takiap - that is the way to do it. Hence my comment earlier about the 'right hand left hand' thing! And Franks' comment about slippery floors also puzzles me because those grooved bits on either side of the squattie pan are there for placing the feet in the least slippery place.
Yes - I know that kind of perching is alien to us and doesn't quite feel safe. But you honestly can get used to it, and the whole thing including squirty sprays is much more hygeinic than placing bum on mucky seat, and 'cleaning' with a shed load of paper!
In fact I did have a spray installed at the previous Chez Carnes. (Mind you I'm also a fan of Thai kettles and tea pots - theres' no hope for some folks.)