General Comment

General chat about life in the Land Of Smiles. Discuss expat life, relationship issues and all things generally Thailand and Asia related.
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PeteC
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General Comment

Post by PeteC »

Bangkok dark and grey these days and too much time on my hands so thought I would make a general comment about this subject and some posts I've read about how to treat these girls. I'm sure others here have said that they are not hookers in the the way most characterize hookers from your home country. The great majority don't want to be doing what they are doing but have to out of financial responsibility for their families. In 34 years now I have never met one who was hooking because of a drug habit or devotion to a pimp but, yes, some have devotion to a Thai husband they don't talk about.

As far as "trust" is concerned. If you've spent some time here and can speak and understand at least survival style Thai, a chat for an hour or so and looking into their eyes will tell the tale if you can trust them or not. If you, the customer, are seen to have a good heart and not just some tourist flake you'll be OK. If you hear her describe you to her friends as "jai dee" (good heart) I don't think you'll ever be hurt or stolen from.

There is a problem with long term (1 month or so) stays and being with the same girl everyday. They get attached. They get attached because many want out and they see you as someone who appears to love them and will take care of them so they can vacate the 1800-0200 hours life forever. You can hurt them badly if not careful. Many foreigners have a big problem settling down and making a committment to a former bar girl but it happens, everyday, and more are succesfull then many column writers in the Kingdom make you believe.

On the other hand, if you really love this place, want to settle here and find a permanent partner; hotel staff, cashiers, store clerks...any woman away from the bar scene may be a safer bet. Once again, don't let anyone tell you that "non-bar girls" aren't looking for a foreign partner. Many if not most over the age of 25 are. If 30+ and unmarried to a Thai or divorced, they really are looking. All you have to do is be a gentlemen with some savy for Thai customs and protocol and you should be successful.

Just like in your home contry, treat these girls well, have understanding, compassion and insight into their customs and desires and you'll be rewarded 100 fold, seldom like what you experience with a girl from your home port. Pete
philip
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Post by philip »

What a heart-warming article, based on good old-fashioned chivalry and common respect for others, of whatever ostensible "status" in life. If only more people were like this.... Chok dee m8 :D
cockneyrebel
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Post by cockneyrebel »

Bang on Pete!!! As one who has just spent 6+ months in the LOS and loved every second of it, your comments are refreshing in that's exactly how I view the beautiful ladies of Thailand but found it hard to put into words. We're often assailed with versions from "people" who should know better, but either through jealousy or just plain bigotry end up reading a tarnished viewpoint from a bitter and twisted perspective.
More power to your elbow mate :thumb:
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