Well here is part 2
Expat living in an Isaan village
Episode 2
Well what has happened since episode 1?
Sorry excuse me a minute an elephant just walked through my garden
Right that’s sorted. I don’t know, with 2 of our dogs on heat my garden resemble a farmyard. Crowing cockerels, cattle and buffalo that have strayed, dogs looking for a bitch on heat and now an elephant strolling around eating the flowers. Must admit last time I was in Kranuan our nearest settlement with its own 711, I was tempted to buy a pellet gun to ward off roaming strays and chickens. Not much good with the elephant though. Need a 410 for that.
Well the schools have broken up. Not that they teach much when they are open, but it’s of course time to party. So we are off to the market but first we must sell some rice to get some pennies to blow on market junk. So off we go to the rice depot loaded with bags of rice and half the village on board the pickup too. Then it’s off to the market to spend hard earned cash.
I park myself at a sort of bar which sells barbecued chicken. So I have a beer and watch the world go by. All manner of Thais turn up. Some in rags and obviously little to spend and some in up market SUVs with a horde of family in tow. Have to sit and have a beer having been told no way should I go spending in the market as a farang will pay more than a Thai. Then its homeward bound with what seems like a forest on board
them
Now I am reminded that it is a special day and all must go to the temple and then we can let off fireworks. Why? No idea. I am told that the fireworks I have carted all the way from Hua Hin may be let off as the head of police has given me permission. So it’s off to the temple
Hey the big guy is the monk was the one I showered with water at Songkran
After that its food time and then get pissed and use up the fireworks. Kids as young as 6 are firing up rockets in their hands and pointing them all over the place. Used to make me cringe but I guess I’m used to it now. Still feel uneasy when a 10 year old is wandering about with a machete. However, they are brought up like that and it is amazing to see a young boy or girl fashioning a blowpipe or catapult from a piece of bamboo with a very sharp machete.
Well this particular celebration went on for 3 days and nights. They have this wonderful ability to party till they drop, drop, go to sleep and wake up, eat and start again.
My monthly escape
Well there are not many expats who can survive village life without a break. Those that do must speak the local dialect and have totally renounced western culture.
Not me. As a social animal I need some western culture to bring me back to reality. So once a month with the excuse that I need my monthly blood test, I go to Khon Kaen. Now Khon Kaen is a vibrant growing town with one of the best universities in Thailand and a growing number of technology firms. Three or four good hotels and a spattering of bars and restaurants. A plethora of good shopping places too.
Well I always stay slightly off centre in a very good guest house run by Derek and his wife. Very good value for money and only 60 Bhaht from the centre of town. Rooms are clean, spacious and have a balcony. Wi-Fi and all mod cons. Free tea/coffee and toast in the mornings and a good basic English breakfast if you want one. You only need to stay a couple of times and you feel part of the family. Staff always have a smile and will help you with anything. Customers I guess are mainly Thais on business but there are a number of regular expats who are either travelling or doing the same as me.
Well after my hospital visit and by the way the hospitals are excellent. I may do a bit of shopping. Stock up with some farang food and other goodies. Then its time for a beer at Eric’s bar. Once again very friendly and eager to please. A few expat regulars frequent a few of the bars which on the whole do not have BGs but there are places that do. BGs tend to be freelance and only frequent certain bars at night. Heard that no bar fines are required. From Eric’s I walk to Rockies (run by a nice guy called Allen) for a farang meal. Sunday roast, ham egg and chips and many more and all good but his special, for me anyway, is his cottage pie. The best I’ve had anywhere including the UK
There are many good restaurants around but the bar and restaurants are suffering and some even closing. Khon Kaen does not have a big tourist throughput and as such relies on relatively local trade and word of mouth. The tourists that do come here tend to use Khon Kaen as a base and travel round Isaan.
I’ve not been living in Isaan long (nearly 6 months) but have been visiting now for over 6 years but I already have friends who I meet in KK and live a similar life to me.
For those of you who may contemplate a visit to the Khon Kaen province try accessing the KK forum (Khon Kaen.com}. Lots of info and lots of guys to give you advice. Friendly site, not overly moderated but it doesn’t need to be as very little abuse and mud slinging
Well back to the village for some more education
Thats the view from the village north, south, east and west
So what’s it cost to live the village life?
Very little. No rent, no aircon, water - 100 baht/mth , power - 400 baht/mth (fans all day, washing machine every 2 days, 2 fridge freezers, TV, 2 computers), drinking water off the roof, beer - large Chang 35 Baht,
Food, well that depends on your balance of farang vs. Thai food. Well I bring up some farang stuff from KK and I guess my balance is 80% Thai 20% farang. Thai food virtually costs me nothing. Its either caught in the bush or bought in the local market. For example the other day in the market I bought a kilo of tripe for 40 baht, 2 large still alive fish for 80 baht, kilo of spare ribs for 100 baht. You can buy a large chicken from a farmer for 100 baht. So you can survive up here for next to nothing.
The hot air Balloon
Well here we go again. Another celebration of some sort. Three Thai neighbours turned up and asked if they could use my floor. Well what hell do they want with my floor? Well “Its flat, clean, no dogs or rats and we want to build a balloon”. So I said “go ahead”. They were armed with thin bamboo, some wire, thin coloured paper, glue and machetes. The paper was glued together and the bamboo honed until circular to produce bands. The paper was slipped over the bamboo band to create an 8 foot tall cylinder with the top sealed by paper. Voila, a balloon. Wire was secured to the base with a hole fashioned to hold a candle. Off to the temple they went with their homemade offering.
Well its afternoon siesta time. Hang on someone’s nicked my hammock
Ah well back to my den. I know them well from my days in Canada and the States. In the UK it was my garage or the shed
Ah well, back to my den and get my feet up
Like the glass windows above the wooden windows? Missed it being done so was unable to correct them.
Well back to building.
I had this room added to the house and it is my den.
No one but No one is allowed in without my invite. This is my space. Still need to get some foliage in there but to all intent and purposes its finished. Houses all my computer gear, books, DVDs, own fridge, cobwebbed golf clubs and all my memorabilia.
Well builders of quality are hard to come by in a village and you are also in danger of alienation if you provide work to another village. Well I thought I’m no builder but all that is needed is 4 walls, some tiles, some power points and windows and a door. Not too complicated Eh?
So after a bit of searching I found a bricklayer, a plasterer, a tile man and a sort of electrician. I would supervise and no drinking during working hours. I bought the materials at cost and then said how much. Well originally it was going to be 12ft by 14ft and the quote for the lot was 8K. After muttering “piss off” under my breath, I said no. Then I said “ I’ll give you 10k for 14ft by 24ft”, that for building, plastering, painting, fixing doors and windows, electrics and clearing the mess up at completion. They set to and completed it in 3 days. There were 6 of them and the family came in to do some painting for a beer or three. So there you have it. A den for 250 quid including materials.
Now maybe I should bring the gang down to Hua Hin and ply my trade!!!!
So I guess you are still wondering about the elephant.
You think I’m making it up don’t you? Well we do have elephants in the village but they are usually tamed and used for work. This was the biggest I’ve seen in Thailand and had a mahout so I guess he was plying for haulage trade.
The Thai farmers here are suffering financially, Fancy machinery, tractors and rice reapers are up for sale. They are reverting to buffalo and farm workers to plough, sow and reap to earn their crust. You only have to look at the motorcycle and motor traders plots in Khon Kaen and Kranuan to see loads of unsold new vehicles and an increasing number of repossessed second hand stuff going very cheap. A good SUV can be had for 200K in almost pristine condition.
Talking of elephants I gotta tell you this one. On a computer management training course way back in my youth we had a think on your feet session. Hand in a hat and pull out a piece of paper then 30 seconds to think about it and then stand up on the stage and spout for 5 minutes. Well my bit of paper said “The pros and cons of owning an elephant”. Had I not worked for Billy Smarts circus for a spell I would have been stumped. Well without spouting too much there are many benefits in owning an elephant. Car washing, lawn sprinkler, compost on tap to name a few but I digress. Back to topic.
Of course the Thais are suffering through the economic strain and many are returning to their villages from BK,HH and Phuket where the building work has slowed only to find work is not readily available and of course farming here is seasonable but in true Thai fashion its live for today tomorrow is a different game. So its get the sticky rice our and some Lao Khow and get plastered and go to sleep.
Will I stay here for good? Doubt it. Need my monthly westernization and besides the nomad in me will at some stage say it’s time to move on.
However, whilst I am here I am willing to send you all a piece of the Isaan action provided you are interested.
So its bye bye for now
Cheers
Richard
Ps I am going to post this without editing. Line has dropped 3 times alreadyt
