Not sure where I got this but thought I should share it with you all.
The other day a young person asked me how I felt about being old. I was taken aback, for I do not think of myself as old. Upon seeing my reaction, she was immediately embarrassed, but I explained that it was an interesting question, and I would ponder it, and let her know.
Old Age, I decided, is a gift.
I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always wanted to be. Oh, not my body! I sometime despair over my body, the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, and the sagging butt. And often I am taken aback by that old person that lives in my mirror (who looks like my mother!), but I don't agonize over those things for long.
I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become more kind to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend.
I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn't need, but looks so avante garde on my patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.
I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.
Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 AM and sleep until noon?
I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 60&70's, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love ... I will.
I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the jet set.
They, too, will get old.
I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things.
Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.
I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver.
As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be wrong.
So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day.
_________________
Norm
Getting old
Perfect!
Norm, that is a really lovely piece and I thank you for posting it.
It fits my situation so precisely and puts it into words that I intend to keep.
(The first HHAD post I have ever saved in fact!)
It is really appropriate here at the end of one year and beginning of the next when one tends to step back and look at the big picture.
It reminds me of a poem by Jenny Joseph along the same lines:
Warning
When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick the flowers in other people's gardens
And learn to spit.
You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.
But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.
But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple
It fits my situation so precisely and puts it into words that I intend to keep.
(The first HHAD post I have ever saved in fact!)
It is really appropriate here at the end of one year and beginning of the next when one tends to step back and look at the big picture.
It reminds me of a poem by Jenny Joseph along the same lines:
Warning
When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick the flowers in other people's gardens
And learn to spit.
You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.
But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.
But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple
On aging gracefully
I came across this in an internet search.
It struck me as having a lot of truth to it and to be worth sharing.
Aging gracefully:
1. Eat right but don't diet. Diets fail.
2. Exercise, and the more, the better.
3. Be an educated consumer of healthcare and be willing to ask pointed questions.
4. Be happy. The important elements of happiness are:
* Love. Being in love is central to a long and independent life. Married men live 10 years longer than single men, and women benefit also. The key is a longstanding, loving, monogamous and intimate relationship.
* Faith. People who have faith tend to live longer and be happier than those who don't.
* Creativity. Stay occupied and get involved. Be a life-long learner, Be willing to take on new tasks and have a plan for retirement.
* High self-esteem. The more you think of yourself, the better you'll be. You have to realize that each and every one of you is truly beautiful. I love telling men they're beautiful, because beauty is not what you look like, it's what you stand for, it's what you've done, it's what emanates from you, it's your contributions, your intellect, your love, your humor, and what you give back to the community. I always end my TV show, Aging Successfully with Lipschitz, to wake up in the morning, look at themselves in the mirror and tell themselves they're "gorgeous." Feel good about yourself and your future will be bright.
5. Remember aging is something to celebrate. And the best is yet to come.
It struck me as having a lot of truth to it and to be worth sharing.
Aging gracefully:
1. Eat right but don't diet. Diets fail.
2. Exercise, and the more, the better.
3. Be an educated consumer of healthcare and be willing to ask pointed questions.
4. Be happy. The important elements of happiness are:
* Love. Being in love is central to a long and independent life. Married men live 10 years longer than single men, and women benefit also. The key is a longstanding, loving, monogamous and intimate relationship.
* Faith. People who have faith tend to live longer and be happier than those who don't.
* Creativity. Stay occupied and get involved. Be a life-long learner, Be willing to take on new tasks and have a plan for retirement.
* High self-esteem. The more you think of yourself, the better you'll be. You have to realize that each and every one of you is truly beautiful. I love telling men they're beautiful, because beauty is not what you look like, it's what you stand for, it's what you've done, it's what emanates from you, it's your contributions, your intellect, your love, your humor, and what you give back to the community. I always end my TV show, Aging Successfully with Lipschitz, to wake up in the morning, look at themselves in the mirror and tell themselves they're "gorgeous." Feel good about yourself and your future will be bright.
5. Remember aging is something to celebrate. And the best is yet to come.