I started the thread about do Europeans outnumber Americans living in Hua Hin, reason........I'm trying to escape all the madness here and live in a more relaxed atmosphere. Thailand to me seems to be that place.
What did your family say?
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Mongo Slade
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What did your family say?
I just feel the need to vent, everytime I share my dreams of retiring in Thailand my family puts me through a guilt trip. I fell in love with Thailand my first time there and I can't shake that feeling. There is no way that they can talk me out of it, my mind is made up.
I started the thread about do Europeans outnumber Americans living in Hua Hin, reason........I'm trying to escape all the madness here and live in a more relaxed atmosphere. Thailand to me seems to be that place.
I started the thread about do Europeans outnumber Americans living in Hua Hin, reason........I'm trying to escape all the madness here and live in a more relaxed atmosphere. Thailand to me seems to be that place.
One must always revisit the past in order to move ahead to the future.
Mongo Slade,
People tried to put me off going to Thailand too. There is a warped view in the UK that older men going to Thailand do so for the cheap sex with younger girls. I think the best answer to that accusation is....so what?
Older people in the UK are treated as if old age is a disease or something you should feel guilty about. Not only do fat-assed sexless sour-faced dour UK middle aged woman expect you to be miserable with them, once they have grabbed nearly everything you have worked for, they expect you to sit miserably alone at your divorced home rather than lose your 'dignity' by actually getting away from the narrow minded possesion obsessed western world- to enjoy the rest of your short life in a blissful paradise!
Don't even think about it - just do it!
People tried to put me off going to Thailand too. There is a warped view in the UK that older men going to Thailand do so for the cheap sex with younger girls. I think the best answer to that accusation is....so what?
Older people in the UK are treated as if old age is a disease or something you should feel guilty about. Not only do fat-assed sexless sour-faced dour UK middle aged woman expect you to be miserable with them, once they have grabbed nearly everything you have worked for, they expect you to sit miserably alone at your divorced home rather than lose your 'dignity' by actually getting away from the narrow minded possesion obsessed western world- to enjoy the rest of your short life in a blissful paradise!
Don't even think about it - just do it!
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Kraka's Dad
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Mongo,
You could ask your family if they want you to be happy? When they say they do then you can tell them that you being happy means you living in Thailand to enjoy the rest of your life. Hopefully they will understand. After all I'm sure you spent much time and money trying to make sure that they were as happy as they could be so now it should be your turn. Still a difficult situation for you I'm sure.
Good luck
You could ask your family if they want you to be happy? When they say they do then you can tell them that you being happy means you living in Thailand to enjoy the rest of your life. Hopefully they will understand. After all I'm sure you spent much time and money trying to make sure that they were as happy as they could be so now it should be your turn. Still a difficult situation for you I'm sure.
Good luck
The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.
Every Mum and Dad wants their offspring to be happy - hopefully.
The thing is that parents may think that you're doing the wrong thing at the wrong stage in your life.
I've got Aunts who emigrated to India about 60 years ago. I've had a grandmother who emigrated from Norway to Scotland a long time ago.
I left England only 8 years ago and was the first of "my generation" to do so.
It's never easy.
Thing is, how old are you, MS?
The thing is that parents may think that you're doing the wrong thing at the wrong stage in your life.
I've got Aunts who emigrated to India about 60 years ago. I've had a grandmother who emigrated from Norway to Scotland a long time ago.
I left England only 8 years ago and was the first of "my generation" to do so.
It's never easy.
Thing is, how old are you, MS?
Mongo,
Good question - a dilema that I currently share with you.
No family wants you out of easy reach, so you have to concentrate on the positives:
* Thailand isn't that far away these days - 12 hours by air. It could take that long to reach the remote areas of Scotland.
* Cheap holidays in the sun - I'm making a point of making sure I buy a place with at least one spare room. I intend to encourage friends and relatives to visit.
* I intend a reciprical arrangement whereby I will stay with them during UK visits.
* Phone calls are very cheap (if not actually free these days).
* Our happiness - on my pension we would survive in the UK. In Thailand we will have a good life.
I could go on, but I'm sure you already know the score. If they are family worth having, they will surely come around to your way of thinking. If they won't come around, you have to decide whose hapiness comes first. At the end of the day, how many hours do they spend with you each year? If they visit you for a month every year, they will have you for a full 720 hours - I'll bet that far outweighs the time you spend with each other now.
If they think about it clearly, they'll see that it makes good sense.
Personally, although I respect their opinion, my close family comes first - we are moving within 2 years regardless.
Good question - a dilema that I currently share with you.
No family wants you out of easy reach, so you have to concentrate on the positives:
* Thailand isn't that far away these days - 12 hours by air. It could take that long to reach the remote areas of Scotland.
* Cheap holidays in the sun - I'm making a point of making sure I buy a place with at least one spare room. I intend to encourage friends and relatives to visit.
* I intend a reciprical arrangement whereby I will stay with them during UK visits.
* Phone calls are very cheap (if not actually free these days).
* Our happiness - on my pension we would survive in the UK. In Thailand we will have a good life.
I could go on, but I'm sure you already know the score. If they are family worth having, they will surely come around to your way of thinking. If they won't come around, you have to decide whose hapiness comes first. At the end of the day, how many hours do they spend with you each year? If they visit you for a month every year, they will have you for a full 720 hours - I'll bet that far outweighs the time you spend with each other now.
If they think about it clearly, they'll see that it makes good sense.
Personally, although I respect their opinion, my close family comes first - we are moving within 2 years regardless.
Hi Mongo,
Just go for it, as you say, you have already made up your mind anyway. I’ve been away from my home town since I joined the Royal Navy at 16 years of age, and have been moving around for over 25 years now.
Every time I go back there I hear people complaining how dissatisfied they are and how they would love to travel, but however much I encourage them they are always afraid to move on.
From your posts you obviously want to move to Thailand, if you don’t do it you will regret it for the rest of your life, if things don’t work out you can always go back. As others have pointed out, it’s not so difficult to get back to visit anyway; every year I go back to see my mother and she is always complaining that she hasn’t seen my brother who lives about ten miles away!
Just go for it, as you say, you have already made up your mind anyway. I’ve been away from my home town since I joined the Royal Navy at 16 years of age, and have been moving around for over 25 years now.
Every time I go back there I hear people complaining how dissatisfied they are and how they would love to travel, but however much I encourage them they are always afraid to move on.
From your posts you obviously want to move to Thailand, if you don’t do it you will regret it for the rest of your life, if things don’t work out you can always go back. As others have pointed out, it’s not so difficult to get back to visit anyway; every year I go back to see my mother and she is always complaining that she hasn’t seen my brother who lives about ten miles away!
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ajarnfrank
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- Location: Hua Hin
All around the world, there are billions of people who never travel more than a few hundred miles from their home. However, except for a trip to Egypt as an infant, that applies to Jesus, who changed the world.
My grandfather was from an old New Jersey family, but his company moved him to San Francisco for a few years. It probably took them three days by train. My father was born in Berkeley, CA, but soon moved to New Jersey, where he grew up in the Addams Family's house (really). When his company transferred him to Chicago, he went. Decades later, it took us a day and a half to travel from Chicago to NJ in 1956. I grew up in Chicago area, but settled in Texas. Our family has 'migrated' a lot, for a century now.
Family. In any culture, you need to ask, "Who is my family?" Speaking of the reported life of Jesus, he went off the deep end and started preaching. Mama brought the brothers and sisters to town to bring Jesus home, and he replied, "Who is my family? Those who stay closest to me."
I miss my family and friends, but I often went long times without seeing them much. We've now got at least three generations of grandparents who seldom saw their kids or grandkids.
What did my kids say when I told them I was moving to Thailand? They were neither surprised nor disappointed; it was my third foreign country. They get around a lot, themselves; we're having a reunion in Ireland in 366 days.
My grandfather was from an old New Jersey family, but his company moved him to San Francisco for a few years. It probably took them three days by train. My father was born in Berkeley, CA, but soon moved to New Jersey, where he grew up in the Addams Family's house (really). When his company transferred him to Chicago, he went. Decades later, it took us a day and a half to travel from Chicago to NJ in 1956. I grew up in Chicago area, but settled in Texas. Our family has 'migrated' a lot, for a century now.
Family. In any culture, you need to ask, "Who is my family?" Speaking of the reported life of Jesus, he went off the deep end and started preaching. Mama brought the brothers and sisters to town to bring Jesus home, and he replied, "Who is my family? Those who stay closest to me."
I miss my family and friends, but I often went long times without seeing them much. We've now got at least three generations of grandparents who seldom saw their kids or grandkids.
What did my kids say when I told them I was moving to Thailand? They were neither surprised nor disappointed; it was my third foreign country. They get around a lot, themselves; we're having a reunion in Ireland in 366 days.
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Mongo Slade
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- Location: USA MARYLAND
I really appreciate the show of support and words of encouragement from all of you who contributed to this post.
I was taught at an early age that family always comes first and I've always honored these values. I was talking to my sister in the presence of my mother about liquidating all of my assets because of my intended move to LOS. My mom hit the ceiling and said that I was crazy and I didn't know what the hell I was doing! As calmly as I could I said, mom this is my life, I'm 61 years old, I've spent 37yrs on one job and retired. I also said I've done for others most of my life and it's time that I do something for me. I also told her she should feel happy for me if what I'm doing makes me happy and I'm not harming anyone. She will get over it, she has another son and daugther close by
Not only do family have a problem with you being out of reach, so do your friends. Misery loves company and those that don't have the balls to make a major change, sit by giving you their negative criticism. They make statements like, why do you have go there, why don't you bring her here?
America may be on the cutting edge, technologically and possess many creature comforts, but for me at this point in time it's a rat race and I don't want to play anymore. I hear Thailand calling, I'll be there soon
I was taught at an early age that family always comes first and I've always honored these values. I was talking to my sister in the presence of my mother about liquidating all of my assets because of my intended move to LOS. My mom hit the ceiling and said that I was crazy and I didn't know what the hell I was doing! As calmly as I could I said, mom this is my life, I'm 61 years old, I've spent 37yrs on one job and retired. I also said I've done for others most of my life and it's time that I do something for me. I also told her she should feel happy for me if what I'm doing makes me happy and I'm not harming anyone. She will get over it, she has another son and daugther close by
Not only do family have a problem with you being out of reach, so do your friends. Misery loves company and those that don't have the balls to make a major change, sit by giving you their negative criticism. They make statements like, why do you have go there, why don't you bring her here?
America may be on the cutting edge, technologically and possess many creature comforts, but for me at this point in time it's a rat race and I don't want to play anymore. I hear Thailand calling, I'll be there soon
One must always revisit the past in order to move ahead to the future.
To pick up on your comment about selling up. I've had that dilemma ever since moving over here. My parents advised me strongly not to do so and I havn't yet. Then again, I'm somewhat younger then you. It would be nice to have a bigger income from bank interest alone and not have the headaches of being a landlord living 6,000 miles away, but I'll wait another 5-10 years.
Big Boy wrote
Remote - I know what you mean - last Hogmanay (the last day of the year) I went out to visit a friend who lives about 1km away and it took me 3 days to get back! Couldn't find a 3.5km runway anywhere ! Couldn't have found anything actually.Thailand isn't that far away these days - 12 hours by air. It could take that long to reach the remote areas of Scotland.
"The older I get ....the better I remember I was."
The bit about your Mom is tricky. Since you are 61 your Mom obviously isn't in the prime of her life. Obviously I don't know anything about your relationship with her but I am guessing she thinks she may never see you again. That can be tough.
I sympathise as I see my wife go through similar things with her mother. We have lived a long way from the UK for 15 years now. Worst time was when she got a phone call on the way to airport to say her Dad had died (she was going to see him because he had been taken to hospital).
Its all about compromise I guess
SS
I sympathise as I see my wife go through similar things with her mother. We have lived a long way from the UK for 15 years now. Worst time was when she got a phone call on the way to airport to say her Dad had died (she was going to see him because he had been taken to hospital).
Its all about compromise I guess
SS
Life's a beach.....