Greng Jai

[buksida]

The word Greng Jai (à¡Ã§ã¨) means consideration or respect for others by putting yourself out, it is a distinctly Thai trait but one that is often quite bizarre.

For example has anyone ever seen any greng jai on the roads? Some of the most inconsiderate, selfish and dangerous drivers I have ever seen reside here in Hua Hin. Or maybe they are all greng jai because they let other people get away with driving like twats without getting angry themselves unlike westerners who result to hurling abuse when some other idiot endangers their life on the road.

Another example is the street parties that Thais have, you know the ones where they block off an entire soi, all their mates park everywhere, they erect a two storey speaker systems and proceed to blast issan music at full bore way into the night without a sniff of consideration for the people living around them. Or maybe the people around them are greng jai for not complaining about it or calling the police - as we would in the west.

A final example is the queuing system which seems to completely go out of the window here as Thais jostle for position or wade straight in front without any thought for the people waiting patiently in line (especially if they happen to be farangs). How often does a Thai let you go before them or hold a door open? Simple manners in the west but lost in the east, or are the queuers being greng jai by letting someone else go as they are in more of a rush?

It just seems to be an excuse to let the arrogant and selfish members of society get away with whatever they please while the more considerate people can be proud because they are greng jai.

[Randy Cornhole]

The queuing one gets me the most. If I am in 7/11 and someone pushes in front of me I say in a loud voice 'mai dii maak maak' put my things on the counter and walk out!

[Big Boy]

buksida wrote:

has anyone ever seen any greng jai on the roads? Some of the most inconsiderate, selfish and dangerous drivers I have ever seen reside here in Hua Hin.

Have you ever studied the way Thais walk in busy places such as the local markets? If you have, you will see that they drive the same way as they walk. They often cut in front of you and stop. They also walk straight at you expecting you to move out of the way. The worse one for me is when they cut in front of you and slow right down.

Unfortunately, a few Thais have caught me not concentrating as I should and I've ploughed straight through them - in road terms, thats the equivalent of a Juggernought plouging into a Mini.

[appleman_thai]

Greng Jai is just a Thai excuse for everything.

We are not supposed to understand it and in fact we are told that we will never understand it no matter how hard we try!

Thats because its just there for our benefit! It is the word they use when they just want to get out of a situation without having to explain why!

Its a cop out.

Dont fall for it!

[usual suspect]

Good observation on the Thais and their manners.

Please note at any given time, in the 7/11 on Bintabaat, while you are
attempting to pay for your goods, the door will open and a sour-faced
katoy or bar-girl will shove in front of you thrusting her arm out and demand a phonecard.
(I only speak limited Thai, but "Oi, f***-**f" normally makes them aware
of my feelings towards their actions).

Another one is while you are walking down a Soi with bars, the bar-girl/
lady-pig will wait on the edge of the bar till you are just adjacent with
her then she steps out and cuts you up, walking straight across your path
to her destination...food barrow/7-11/cuddly-toy stall.
(Don't change your path....the cows won again if you do!).

Final note...I try to explain to the tourists I meet that the Thai 'smile'
only appears when he/she/it is either directly or indirectly taking money
from you.
('cept in the case of flower-girls and police...no smile, just
wasted money).

[Parahandy]

What a sad picture you paint...

Firstly, I assume that you come from 'Mud Island' (the UK), as do I. The reason that I make this assumption is simply because of the old adage that when 'two or three Brits are gathered together under one roof, they form a queue'. So true in Britain, but so untrue pretty much anywhere else in the world. So perhaps you should dispense with your 'farang' mindset and start living in Thailand.

While on that subject, may I suggest that you visit 'real' Thailand, as opposed simply to Soi Bintabaat, or similar places. There you will find the real Thai people, who are totally delightful, and have genuine smiles on their faces. Yes, greng jai exists there as well - the ability to tell you what they think that you want to hear, whether it be true or not - but it is all done with everybody's best interests at heart. So please don't lower Thailand to your experiences in Soi Bintabaat and its environs. There is a lovely country out there somewhere. All you need to do is to go out there and find it. And enjoy it...

P.

[buksida]

Who was that aimed at?

My original post was based upon observations of living in several different parts of the Kingdom over a number of years, granted most of it has been in cities and not rural areas.

[Parahandy]

Not amimed at you, Buksida! Don't worry...

The ususal suspect's post was what motivated my reply.

As an aside, however, why do you use the word 'aim'? Are all us farangs that aggressive?

I hope not. Can we not all live in peace, with our, sometimes, differing opinions?

P.

[SuperTonic]

The queuing one gets me the most. If I am in 7/11 and someone pushes in front of me I say in a loud voice 'mai dii maak maak' put my things on the counter and walk out!

I think queueing is a peculiarly British thing. Certainly no-one had a clue about queues as they were barging me aside at Dubai airport. Not my favourite place in the world to be.

[SuperTonic]

What a sad picture you paint...

Firstly, I assume that you come from 'Mud Island' (the UK), as do I. The reason that I make this assumption is simply because of the old adage that when 'two or three Brits are gathered together under one roof, they form a queue'. So true in Britain, but so untrue pretty much anywhere else in the world. So perhaps you should dispense with your 'farang' mindset and start living in Thailand.

While on that subject, may I suggest that you visit 'real' Thailand, as opposed simply to Soi Bintabaat, or similar places. There you will find the real Thai people, who are totally delightful, and have genuine smiles on their faces. Yes, greng jai exists there as well - the ability to tell you what they think that you want to hear, whether it be true or not - but it is all done with everybody's best interests at heart. So please don't lower Thailand to your experiences in Soi Bintabaat and its environs. There is a lovely country out there somewhere. All you need to do is to go out there and find it. And enjoy it...

P.

Couldn't agree more. Actually you don't have to venture that far to find Thais who will put themselves out for you. I probably should have read this far when I did my first reply.

I think some people allow their opinions of Thailand to be coloured by the seedier sides of it but surely if you hung around similar settings in England (eg a red light district rather than Soi Bintabaat) you will get a similar (actually probably much worse) view of Britain.

I would recommend those who think of Thailand as just what they see in the Bintabaat do as Parahandy suggests and get out there. And also I suggest they show some patience by remembering that people aren't just after money for it's own sake, for many it's a case of survival. At least in Thailand people work for their money, which is more than can be said of many in Britain (mostly our native population before any Daily Mail readers chime in with comments about immigrants).

[buksida]

As an aside, however, why do you use the word 'aim'? Are all us farangs that aggressive?

Maybe a bad choice of wording, the actual post wasn't intended to highlight bad manners or rudeness but just to get a perspective on this "greng jai" business. Thais seem to be very forgiving, tolerant and they never complain, which is why the ones that aren't very "greng jai" get away with behaving like a-holes because everyone else will just smile sheepishly and say "mai bpen rai".

I hope not. Can we not all live in peace, with our, sometimes, differing opinions?
P.

Amen to that, and I agree with you on the Bintabaht thing, it seems to bring out the worst in people, both Thai and farang.

[Parahandy]

Thank you both for your understanding of, and agreement with my thoughts. It's good to know that I am not alone!

A final thought for usual suspect - when you tell these Thais who barge in front of you in queues, which, remember, they think is perfectly normal, to 'eff off', please bear in mind that some of them have brothers or uncles. Some of those brothers and uncles have guns, etc., so you are not really doing yourself any favours...

I certainly don't want to introduce an element of 'fear factor' here, just a tiny slice of common sense, combined with a tiny slice of survival instinct!

Enjoy your time here -

P.

[johnnyk]

Ever tried queuing in Greece or Italy? 555 you will be left for dead and looked at as a naive dope.
I've asked for directions more than once in HH and been given a free motocy ride, no questions asked and any kind of payment refused. Greng jai!
Guy I knew was in hospital from a moto crash, two BGs turned up every day with little pick-me-ups and spent time until he recovered. Greng jai!
I prefer not to say F*** *ff but just give a bit of a stare just so they know I know. Rudeness is everywhere folks.

[Guess]

The OP is a good starter for a debate but I think to even start to try and understand (à¡Ã§ã¨) Greng Jai you have to completely wipe the western culture from your mind. That is not easy. I still struggle with Mai Pen Rai but equally struggle with C'est La Vie on some occasions.

I believe in all three cases they are expressions that are made at certain times by people wishing to avoid confrontation rather then statements that have any real substance.

If you watch children growing up in any part of the world you will notice that by nature the human being is selfish and has to learn to consider others over time. Some do better than others in their life. What is evident though is, that relatively extremely opposed cultures like those of East Asia and Europe, the same sentiment has been instilled to some degree in completely different ways.

What is valued is always important as well. Which is better, the bar girl who jumps the queue for her phone card to enable her to lie to her family and claim she can not send any money and then gives twenty Baht to a beggar, or the Englishman who queues up in the store and walks right past the beggar?

[caller]

Buksi,

Was it really Isaan music?

Or Thai?

Or just very loud?

You are very clued up!