Sealcat wrote:Mr P, would have been difficult when your son came out to you.. was for my dad, we didn't speak for over 15 years, so I can empathise.
It was not my intention to ignite (or re-ignite) any existing tensions
You are not igniting any tensions. I reacted when I saw you politely ask for support (i.e. enough with the jokes) and another joke got fired right back at you. Some support.
I don't like to see people get picked on with mob humour and wanted to interrupt that particular train before it left the station. It's how threads get hijacked and trashed. The rest (as SJ puts it) is just 'guff'.
Big Boy missing the joke completely? Now that's funny.
To answer your question. When my son told me, I realized the difficult road that he had chosen for himself. I didn't want to add to his burden.
As BB and the saintly Kendo might echo... Live and let live.
Mr Plum,
I dont see moderator writen below your name, as i have allready stated a little light hearted banter with the open poster that had no objection to it and even thanked me and asked for my support,
I think this is getting total blown out of preportion, mob humour picking on people, you and GP are talking a load of hogwash.
I think also that you dont choose to be gay its one or the other that feels natral too you, i see you have used the phrase burden, i think that your son being gay is more your problem than his.
Next time i am in town i will gladly meet up with Sean and Allen and any other forum members for a few beers, but that was there whole point of posting this thread to meet people,
as i have said allready i am totally indifferent and really dont care if someone is gay, maybe you should take a leaf out of my book.
Kendo.
Is Bangkok a place or a nasty injury.......Eric Morcombe.
Hello there and thanks for initiating this thread.
Im from Denmark, living together for many years with my thai partner and when in Thailand also his family in Kamphaeng Phet: We have no troubles living openly in Denmark or Thailand. We have for some years been looking for a place to build our own house in Thailand and have chosen HH for many (obvious) reasons. Not the least because compared to Pattaya and Phuket the "professional" gay scene is relaxed or almost invisible.
We find it interesting to make the acquaintance of other gay people in HH and wellcome your opening remarks here. It could also be a proof of the hopefully openminded members of HHAD!?
Christian
I had never seen the 3-10% figure quoted before but given the membership and readership of this board, in theory that should give you a decent sized target audience to give you some feedback.
WL The 10% comes from the 1948 Kinsey Report and for a long time was considered the percentage of gay men to the general population . . .at least in America where the study was done. Later studies have been made and the lowest figure to emerge was 3%. (of the male population being exclusively gay)
Of course with even a limited knowledge of human sexuality, one realizes very quickly that there are more than just two or three "camps" if you will and that the variety of human sexual expression is really amazingly varied and unlimited.
By the way, homosexuality has been known in every culture and at every time period in history with some cultures like the Samurai, Greeks and Romans, most Native American tribes etc having a positive take on the whole thing and others having a negative take. .most notably Western Christianity. . which produced the cultures most of us come from.
Well Sealcat, I sense that we are on something of a positive roll here! and I am feeling more and more hopeful.
Not so sure about Lev's offer of a special thread ( as generous as that is . . and thanks Lev!!) When it was first proposed earlier, my first thought was "shooting gallery and open season" but it may be worth a try.
Welcome DanThai and Smiles! ( "Dont call me Shirley!" LOL)
We don't have a problem with light hearted banter... it was taken as it was meant. In fact, we haven't taken offense at any comments made here so far... fragile we're not!! We'd also be happy to meet with any HHAD members who want to share a beer or two. Just for the record, the vast majority of our friends back in Australia are straight married couples, we have very few gay friends. Most are self obsessed with their sexuality and insist on shoving in people's faces, demanding respect and recognition. Well, respect comes from knowing someone well enough to take on an alternate view of the universe, not simply because you belong to an alternative community. We treat everybody we meet with due respect and continue to do so.. unless, that is, they crap on us from a great height!!
Wanderlust
Thanks for your comments... we have spent may days going through web sites in Thailand, unfortunately most are heavily skewed towards dating/sex, etc.. not where we wanted to go in HH. If any HHAD members know of worthwhile sites, the info would be greatly appreciated. In terms of information, we were looking for more of people's personal views/observations, experiences, plus of course, info on the gay scene here. FYI, Sean (tho Australian) speaks fluent Thai as he spent his first 20 years in BKK with his parents, so dealing with local people is not a problem. Thanks again for you comments.
Lev
Understand your concerns re HHAD... it was/is not our intention to compete with HHAD... in fact we would welcome a loose association as much of the content on your site would be of interest to gay folk. I can't see the benefit of re-inventing the wheel, it only dilutes the benefits available in what is a relatively small market in HH. Will keep you informed of developments.
Danthai
Thanks for coming on board and joining the thread... we look forward to meeting you and your partner when next in HH.
To All
Sean and I appreciate that you have all taken the time to post your comments and thoughts on a subject that might not be too comfortable for some. Please keep them coming....A
I'm sure you know this already, but just in case I'll post the news article I ran across. You guys be careful over here...
Alarm over rising HIV infection among gay men
By Pongphon Sarnsamak
The Nation
Published on October 31, 2008
While the overall figure of people living with HIV/Aids is declining, new infections among men who have sex with men have been increasing drastically during the past few years, causing grave concern at the Public Health Ministry.
Dr Somchai Chakrabhand, directorgeneral of the Disease Control Department, said yesterday that a recent survey looking at the situation across the country of HIV/Aids among this group had found that the risk areas were concentrated in tourism centres such as Bangkok, Chiang Mai and Phuket.
He was speaking at the conclusion of a oneday conference on lessons learned from the project to develop a network of men who have sex with men. About 200 health activists and gayrights advocates attended the meeting.
In Bangkok, a survey of homosexual men found that the incidence of HIV infection had increased from 17 per cent in 2003 to 30 per cent last year. The rate of infection in Chiang Mai rose to 16.9 per cent last year from 15.3 per cent in 2005, while Phuket jumped from 5.5 per cent in 2005 to 20 per cent last year.
The survey also found that half of men in this group do not use condoms with their lovers or temporary partners.
Male sex workers formed a highrisk group for infections due to their unsafe sex behaviour and lack of knowledge on protecting themselves from getting the virus, Somchai said.
"Most of them have anal sex with their partners without using a condom and lubricant. This could cause deep damage to anal tissue and easy transmission of HIV," he said.
He admitted that one factor was that over the past few years the campaign for HIV infection prevention among men who have sex with men, especially raising awareness to use condoms during sex, was discontinued.
Manoon Jaikueankaew of the Disease Control Department's Unit 10 in Chiang Mai, said men who have sex with men could not gain access to public healthcare services and receive medication for HIV/Aids and other sexually transmitted diseases.
Most of them are suffering from gonococcal urethritis, gonorrhoea, syphilis or HIV/Aids. But they do not go to a general clinic or hospital to receive treatment, such as antiretroviral drugs, because they are afraid of presenting themselves to the doctor or do not want others to know about their symptoms.
There are not enough agencies and budget to support operations in local areas and provide knowledge about HIV/Aid prevention to men who have sex with men. Some of them even do not know about the use of condoms and lubricants. So they need a special clinic to provide medication and consultation about HIV/Aids infections.
"A onestop service is really needed to provide information and healthcare to them. This is the only way for them to protect themselves from HIV," he said.
Chatwut Wangwon, of a joint programme of the Public Health Ministry and the US Centres for Disease Control and Prevention, said that while working in Phuket for four years, he found that most men who have sex with men and become infected with HIV are students, of working age and single.
At least 27 per cent of them could have sex with men or women, which means they could transmit the disease also to women.
About 50 per cent of them do not use condoms while only 26 per cent do. Some of them do not use a lubricant but try other substances such as detergent, which could easy destroy a condom.
The best way to reduce HIV infections among this group is providing free condoms and lubricant, Chatwut said. The health authorities also have to raise their awareness of health checks for early warning signs of HIV infections so they can provide medication immediately.
"The best thing that we need to do is make them know earlier about the infection and their symptoms," he added.
Thanks for the info... saw the article myself, doesn't paint a bright future, but Thailand's "Mr Condom" tried for years and made little inroad... I think it's a cultural thing. I lost around 80% of my friends in the first HIV wave that hit Australia not long after the States... thanks whatever god you worship, but I came out untouched healthwise. A lesson was sorely learnt. Thanks again and be assured we do take care... you do the same eh?
1000 views and still alive. Excellent!
Perhaps time for a 'minority' forum on HHAD entitled something along the lines of: e.g. 'Gay Hua Hin'?
Could hardly hurt anything or anyone, doncha think? Forums are always ~ by default ~ "read it if you're interested" anyway.
Thanks to Sealcat ... the many posters who have replied 'au positif' and/or just for laffs ... and to HHAD in general. Hua Hin just gets bigger, and more diverse: As Martha always says, " ... and that's a good f#ck*ng thing ... "
Cheers ...
Any add to the HHAD forum in terms of gay content would be their decision... but I do agree it could only expand the scope of the board and include some new sponsors, ie gay bars, guest houses, etc.
Personally, I take no credit for opening a thread that the HHAD community has had the opportunity to voice their opinions, pro or con. I simply wanted to start a line of communication. I had a small "triple" G&T this arvo to thank everyone on HHAD in absentia.
kendo wrote: ----- you and GP are talking a load of hogwash.
Kendo. What are you smoking? You're nothing but a hypocrite. You said --- "if i thought for one minuite that i was offending anyone then i would apologize quickly". --- Seems to me that MrPlum, who seems a pretty considerate guy, is offended yet all you keep doing is blaming him and anyone else who doesn't get your childish joke. This is Thailand and anything goes. What were you thinking when you were cracking up at your own gags. Make the 'poofs' feel at home? Keep them in their place? They came to Hua Hin to get away from this crap. You don't even live in Hua Hin so who voted you the welcome committee? Grow up.
Calvin,
There really is no problem, discussion is over your not going too reel me in, your a troll, a large number of people are regular visitors to HH and not residents that post on this public forum.
Kendo.
Is Bangkok a place or a nasty injury.......Eric Morcombe.
IMO Calvin has taken a lot of unnecessary comments on here in very good heart - fortunately. He has also taken on board health care warnings which I'm sure he was aware of anyway.
May I just add another warning. We have known other gay Western men in HH whose relationships have sadly broken down due to the same temptations which face heterosexual farang couples. Also one lovely gay expat who was apparently victimised so much that he went home again.
I wish Calvin and his partner well in HH and hope they can find other gay friends in the community to provide friendship, advice and support.
margaretcarnes wrote:
I wish Calvin and his partner well in HH and hope they can find other gay friends in the community to provide friendship, advice and support.
I dont think Calvins actually said he's Gay Margaret, Sealcat was the OP.
Congratulations, Calvin, the Margaret has spoken and you are now officially gay!
I understand what you were saying, C, but I thought you were a bit harsh as Sealcat had already given any pardon required.
Humour/minority groups/PC/common sense/a bit of sensitivity
You'd think it would be easy for everybody to saunter along merrily, wouldn't you, these days, especially with so many other things to worry about? Sadly not.
Have we had "some of my best friends are gay" yet?
If I were gay, I think I'd find the AIDS posting the most offensive on this thread (although I'm sure it wasn't intended to be), with its unspoken assumption that all gays sleep around.
I thought Sealcat's response was remarkably polite and restrained.
Frankly, being gay or straight is hardly worth a mention these days.
being gay or straight is hardly worth a mention these days
I agree with DM, how did this topic get to page 3? Especially in LOS, where everything sexually imaginable is commonplace. I work in an environment where boys want to be girls and sleep with boys, girls who want to be boys and sleep with girls, boys who want to dress a bit like a girl, but still like girls, and a week later they all change their minds and try something else on for size. I vote to end this thread and move on...
“Don't worry about a thing, every little thing is gonna be alright”.....B. Marley
Well if everyone looked at the original post and dealt with that rather than their own insecurities or hang ups, this thread has a chance of being pretty useful to the thread starter, so lets get
might echo... Live and let live.
