Who is exploiting who
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Waste of Breath
.... I can't begin to count in 5 months here mow many times this subject is brought up... Last night by two youngens from Western world....They were so educated on all the issues about this side of the world they even suggested that the Thai children who hope to someday Thai box give up their aspirations.
..... So I asked... In Ireland should they stop drinking Guiness... and in Canada..stop playing hockey???.... You can imagine the look on thier faces. when prompted by such usless conversation about Farang men and Thai women.... we can all psycho babble for hours..... The best advice and this always works... is to ask(usually women) having issues with the prostitution thing.... Ask them if they ever had a one night stand?.... And see if the guy bought them drinks. How long did they stay at the bar.... So lets see. A woman from Western world... gets pissed after 10 pints and 4 hours of conversation goes home and shags ya for no cash and the Thai girl who drinks a little and wants the same things the Western woman has but doenst have the money for it .... is wrong??? I need some help on this one!!!..... They have books for people who don't understand different cultures and ways of life.... chok di in the New Year.
..... So I asked... In Ireland should they stop drinking Guiness... and in Canada..stop playing hockey???.... You can imagine the look on thier faces. when prompted by such usless conversation about Farang men and Thai women.... we can all psycho babble for hours..... The best advice and this always works... is to ask(usually women) having issues with the prostitution thing.... Ask them if they ever had a one night stand?.... And see if the guy bought them drinks. How long did they stay at the bar.... So lets see. A woman from Western world... gets pissed after 10 pints and 4 hours of conversation goes home and shags ya for no cash and the Thai girl who drinks a little and wants the same things the Western woman has but doenst have the money for it .... is wrong??? I need some help on this one!!!..... They have books for people who don't understand different cultures and ways of life.... chok di in the New Year.
Every Farang should read the book 'Private Dancer' by Stephen Leather. It puts the who's exploiting who concept into perspective in a very balanced, readable story.
My take is that both Farang and BG engage in a 'transaction', for very different reasons. It ends in tears when one party (usually Farang) doesn't understand, or is blinkered to, the rules.
Cav
My take is that both Farang and BG engage in a 'transaction', for very different reasons. It ends in tears when one party (usually Farang) doesn't understand, or is blinkered to, the rules.
Cav
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Came across this one a few days ago met a nice guy in a bar after a few beers, I suspect he started with beer cornflakes he tells me what a wonderful time he's having and how he likes his G/f very much they have been together for all of his holiday and he's going to save her as she's a nice lady. Why do tourists and the noble expat think they are saving Thai ladies from themselves, there was never any mention of what his G/f thought about being saved the assumption was that as she had been with him for three weeks he could decide her future and it was one of emails and sms for the next twelve months until he comes back. I know for sure it's not only the girls who say I wait you long time, the guys do the same,
once a girl gave me an email from a guy which from memory said sorry I have not written I have been busy at work will be in town next week meet me at the airport etc she had not heard from this guy for eleven months!!
Do Europeans still believe that they are missionaries, coming to Asia to save the savage from a life misery and depravity.
I think Asia is doing fine one of the things I love about this place is that it's the opposite of the western world it gives me a view of the world from a whole new angle and I love Thia's and Thailand for being exactly what they are uniquely Thai.
They were here before we arrived and will with any luck still be here long after were gone.
once a girl gave me an email from a guy which from memory said sorry I have not written I have been busy at work will be in town next week meet me at the airport etc she had not heard from this guy for eleven months!!
Do Europeans still believe that they are missionaries, coming to Asia to save the savage from a life misery and depravity.
I think Asia is doing fine one of the things I love about this place is that it's the opposite of the western world it gives me a view of the world from a whole new angle and I love Thia's and Thailand for being exactly what they are uniquely Thai.
They were here before we arrived and will with any luck still be here long after were gone.
There's no such thing as a free lunch
Shadow's post reminds me of a story I heard from a guy not long after I first started coming to Thailand. You can imagine the scene - me, the luvved up, rose-tinted spectacle wearing newbie, overwhelmed by the sights and sounds of Bangkok and propping up a bar at Clinton Plaza whilst being soberly advised with a bitter personal tale of woe from this long term British ex-pat. The kind of scene we all notice because we've all done it! Anyway, here is the tale, on the theme of 'rescue.'
The guy told me that he used to come over to Thailand frequently on business, some years before he eventually settled in LoS. He used to stay at The Oriental and would visit a respectable salon nearby for the usual haircut, foot massage, pedicure, manicure etc. Over the course of a few months he realised he was falling hopelessly in love with one of the girls at the salon. Kind, gentle, shy and polite she was a vision of purity and loveliness. In due course a relationship developed and after a very respectable courtship they became engaged to be married.
At about this time a Thai friend informed our hero that his fiance might not be quite as pure as he thought. With some difficulty and no little tact he suggested that she was moonlighting in a Thai brothel. Not as a 'cashier' either but as a fully paid up call girl. Of course, this generated great indignation and there was a big argument. However, the seed had been sown and eventually he confronted her. She immediately broke down and admitted that she was working off a family debt and was, in effect, bonded to the brothel until the debt was paid. Broken hearted but still hopelessly in love with his girl our hero met with the brothel owners and galantly paid off the debt in full. They agreed to put it behind them and in time they were married. Our hero showing great understanding in wiping the slate clean of his wife's previous predicament.
Over the next couple of years the farang takes his wife to England and she meets the family. After overcoming their initial preconceptions they all grow to love her gentle, carefree nature, especially our hero's elderly mother who has longed for her son to meet the right woman. One day, after they have returned to Thailand and set up home in a nice condo in central Bangkok our hero has to return to England for an extended business trip. He is away about three weeks and cannot wait to return to Thailand to be with his lovely wife again. However, on his return he finds that his apartment has been completely cleared and his wife is nowhere to be seen! There is a note; a one-liner coldly informing him that she has left him. No other explanation.
Stunned, broken hearted (again) and angry, he hired a private investigator who soon tracked her down to a rural outpost where she had shacked up with what turned out to be her old Thai boyfriend. It turned out that all the posessions from the condo had been sold and the money frittered away. Our man chose his moment carefully and confronted her whilst she was alone. "I accept that I have lost you but no explanation, all our belongings gone - why?"
When the answer came it was like a knife to the heart, spat out with venom.
"Because you are a stupid falang!"
He could not believe that his sweet, tender wife, whom he had rescued from a fate worse than death and given everything could ever say such a thing. She had never loved him. She had used him and then tossed him aside. He meant nothing to her. In a fury he slapped her so hard that he lifted her off the ground. As she sat looking back at him with hatred in her eyes he told her that the next time he saw her she would be in the gutter. Apparently he saw her, in the gutter, washing dishes a year or so later.
Not sure what the moral of the story is but I hope it entertained!
I just hope that this does not turn out to be one of those standard apocryphal stories that everyone has heard before now!
The guy told me that he used to come over to Thailand frequently on business, some years before he eventually settled in LoS. He used to stay at The Oriental and would visit a respectable salon nearby for the usual haircut, foot massage, pedicure, manicure etc. Over the course of a few months he realised he was falling hopelessly in love with one of the girls at the salon. Kind, gentle, shy and polite she was a vision of purity and loveliness. In due course a relationship developed and after a very respectable courtship they became engaged to be married.
At about this time a Thai friend informed our hero that his fiance might not be quite as pure as he thought. With some difficulty and no little tact he suggested that she was moonlighting in a Thai brothel. Not as a 'cashier' either but as a fully paid up call girl. Of course, this generated great indignation and there was a big argument. However, the seed had been sown and eventually he confronted her. She immediately broke down and admitted that she was working off a family debt and was, in effect, bonded to the brothel until the debt was paid. Broken hearted but still hopelessly in love with his girl our hero met with the brothel owners and galantly paid off the debt in full. They agreed to put it behind them and in time they were married. Our hero showing great understanding in wiping the slate clean of his wife's previous predicament.
Over the next couple of years the farang takes his wife to England and she meets the family. After overcoming their initial preconceptions they all grow to love her gentle, carefree nature, especially our hero's elderly mother who has longed for her son to meet the right woman. One day, after they have returned to Thailand and set up home in a nice condo in central Bangkok our hero has to return to England for an extended business trip. He is away about three weeks and cannot wait to return to Thailand to be with his lovely wife again. However, on his return he finds that his apartment has been completely cleared and his wife is nowhere to be seen! There is a note; a one-liner coldly informing him that she has left him. No other explanation.
Stunned, broken hearted (again) and angry, he hired a private investigator who soon tracked her down to a rural outpost where she had shacked up with what turned out to be her old Thai boyfriend. It turned out that all the posessions from the condo had been sold and the money frittered away. Our man chose his moment carefully and confronted her whilst she was alone. "I accept that I have lost you but no explanation, all our belongings gone - why?"
When the answer came it was like a knife to the heart, spat out with venom.
"Because you are a stupid falang!"
He could not believe that his sweet, tender wife, whom he had rescued from a fate worse than death and given everything could ever say such a thing. She had never loved him. She had used him and then tossed him aside. He meant nothing to her. In a fury he slapped her so hard that he lifted her off the ground. As she sat looking back at him with hatred in her eyes he told her that the next time he saw her she would be in the gutter. Apparently he saw her, in the gutter, washing dishes a year or so later.
Not sure what the moral of the story is but I hope it entertained!
I just hope that this does not turn out to be one of those standard apocryphal stories that everyone has heard before now!
Well said Shadow and a brilliant story by Jaime.SHADOW wrote: Do Europeans still believe that they are missionaries, coming to Asia to save the savage from a life misery and depravity.
I think Asia is doing fine one of the things I love about this place is that it's the opposite of the western world it gives me a view of the world from a whole new angle and I love Thia's and Thailand for being exactly what they are uniquely Thai.
Thank you both.
I intend to live forever - so far so good.
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No need we have already got that problem sussed. Wear a Balaclava. Many farangs here work in the building trade without work permits. You will see many builders here wearing Balaclavs in broad daylight. Nearly all of them are farangs working on the black building market because ther are no Thais available. The Thais are all doing highly paid clerical and official jobs and driving around in top end SUVs, BMWs and Mercedes.Jaime wrote:Steve,
You will have to do the work in secret by night - can't see you getting a work permit for such a manual activity.
Many thanks to SHADOW and Jaime for the two stories.
[color=blue][size=134]Care in the community success story.[/size][/color]