Married and a bun in the oven

General chat about life in the Land Of Smiles. Discuss expat life, relationship issues and all things generally Thailand and Asia related.
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STEVE G
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Re: Married and a bun in the oven

Post by STEVE G »

Just follow the old adage of never putting more money into Asia than you're prepared to lose and you won't go too far wrong. In Thailand, I've now got a partner, a step son, two houses, a small farm, a pick up truck, two motor bikes, four dogs and a Mother in law but it's all been done over ten years and I've spent less per year than some of my colleagues do on fast cars.
I had a failed relationship in Indonesia and eventually ended up giving my daughter the house, it was all paid for and she will have somewhere to live so "inshallah" as they say in that neck of the woods.
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MrPlum
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Re: Married and a bun in the oven

Post by MrPlum »

Maybe there are some cultural differences which explain the differences in approach? When I married in the UK, someone suggested a pre-nup. I was horrified at the idea that you would plan for failure and discounted the idea. After all, who gets married to get divorced? No-one I know. And yet, the divorce statistics don't lie.

Then there is the abandonment of caution that comes from living abroad. We buy a property without legal protection. We put cars in our girlfriend's name when we would never do such a thing back home.

There is also the obvious part of the arrangement that says "I am young and beautiful, you are old and past it. I will be your wife if you take care of me financially". Surely that's a part of the contract? You know that money is going to be part of the deal. Knowing that, I don't think anyone can complain.

I do know of a couple where the husband died. He was in his 70s, she in her 20's. The 'lady' who had some previous history was set to inherit millions of baht. The family made it clear. We will give you 1 million baht and no more, otherwise we will drag it through the courts for years and you many never get anything. She took the offer.

I wish the couple well. Nice that he has found someone and is creating a family after being single for so long. One of the great things about Thailand is that such unions are possible.

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Re: Married and a bun in the oven

Post by kendo »

I wish your friend well Richard,
Now you have had all the negative stuff on here, just a question from your mate Kendo someone who's been married for 7 years to a Thai, and aged 41, how is your friend going to support his new life married with a family.

The whole work restrictions and everything being stacked against farangs is the reason why we live in the UK the thought of money issues could put tremendous strain on any relationship in my opinion.

I would just like to echo BB comments, on this thread bloody good points.

Also i have been with my Mrs a long time and can't help but think, some men are really deluded that they think they can have a really happy relationship marriage with a girl many years younger, and when it all go's tits up always the girls fault that makes my blood boil. :thumb:

Kendo. :cheers:
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Re: Married and a bun in the oven

Post by christopher1 »

I've lived here for over 10 years and been happily married for just over 9.
My wife is beautiful in every sense of the meaning.
She doesn't drink, smoke, gamble or speak English!
We live in a beautiful house, have cars and motorbykes (all in her name.)

I rented for the first 6 years of marriage and still own my house in the UK.
Not because I didn't trust her, I just wasn't willing to burn all my bridges back home.
I did something that a lot of my friends didn't do, which was, to sell up, live for today etc...I waited and I'm sure glad that I did.

BTW. I'm not that old!
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Re: Married and a bun in the oven

Post by BaaBaa. »

STEVE G wrote:Just follow the old adage of never putting more money into Asia than you're prepared to lose and you won't go too far wrong. In Thailand, I've now got a partner, a step son, two houses, a small farm, a pick up truck, two motor bikes, four dogs and a Mother in law but it's all been done over ten years and I've spent less per year than some of my colleagues do on fast cars.
I had a failed relationship in Indonesia and eventually ended up giving my daughter the house, it was all paid for and she will have somewhere to live so "inshallah" as they say in that neck of the woods.
You got the dogs and Mother in Law as an added bonus though surely?

:cheers:
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margaretcarnes
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Re: Married and a bun in the oven

Post by margaretcarnes »

jingjoe wrote:You have to remember margaret there is no social security here in thailand,my ex can't work because she is caring for our son so where does the money come from if i don't contribute.I see my son every week,she has to drive an hour to my house,how does she pay for petrol?
The document we signed at the amphur,my lawyer says is enforceable by a court,if my wife didn't contribute the 3000bht towards childs care,then i could deny access.
I would also like to add ,although i pay for my sons upkeep,my ex is with the baby 24/7 waking up every four to six hours for feeds,caring for him when he is sick,caring for him also when she is sick!,so it might seem that i contribute more financially, but it would be pretty hard to put a dollar value on what she contributes.

gawd now i am defending my ex :)
You are indeed jingjoe! Having second thoughts? :wink: Seriously it does seem a shame to have split with such a young baby.
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STEVE G
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Re: Married and a bun in the oven

Post by STEVE G »

BaaBaa. wrote:
STEVE G wrote:Just follow the old adage of never putting more money into Asia than you're prepared to lose and you won't go too far wrong. In Thailand, I've now got a partner, a step son, two houses, a small farm, a pick up truck, two motor bikes, four dogs and a Mother in law but it's all been done over ten years and I've spent less per year than some of my colleagues do on fast cars.
I had a failed relationship in Indonesia and eventually ended up giving my daughter the house, it was all paid for and she will have somewhere to live so "inshallah" as they say in that neck of the woods.
You got the dogs and Mother in Law as an added bonus though surely?

:cheers:
The Mother in Law was free but the last two dogs cost me 500 bt for the pair.
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Re: Married and a bun in the oven

Post by Big Boy »

Which is best at keeping burglars away? :D
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STEVE G
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Re: Married and a bun in the oven

Post by STEVE G »

Big Boy wrote:Which is best at keeping burglars away? :D
The dogs bark louder but the Mother in Law has a worst bite.
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Re: Married and a bun in the oven

Post by fach3003 »

Tell your friend to go for it !!!!

My Bahts worth
Happy story so far :D
Been married 9 years...2nd best thing ive ever done !
First is having a 4 year old son.......

Where much the same age she's 34 im 39
She was in UK for 7 years
been here 2 years....been bliss....Loving it......
Rent your house out...I did....

Not easy to work here bear this in mind.
and for us younger ones its along time till retirement ! ......

Only been 'bumped' for cash by one family member but lesson learnt.

Have 5 dogs and the mother in Law as well.....
Chuck Norris is scared of my mother in Law....

Good luck to your friend Richard....

Regards to all...... :cheers:

Fach
The only Geordie in sleepy Cha am since 2009 :cheers:
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Re: Married and a bun in the oven

Post by BaaBaa. »

STEVE G wrote:
Big Boy wrote:Which is best at keeping burglars away? :D
The dogs bark louder but the Mother in Law has a worst bite.
:lach:

Mine is lovely, really nice lady.

According to her ID she's only 7 years older than me, I'm 32, the GF is 25, so she's either had my GF ridiculously young (but my GF has an older sister) or i read that in the past that Thais didn't get their birthdates until they were registered so she could be a few years older.

christopher1 wrote:She doesn't speak English!
Some guys have all the luck.
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