I am literally going INSANE because of my Thai girlfriend, I swear to GOD she is dumber than a BOX OF ROCKS! I have been trying and trying for years to improve our quality of life together, but she has always shown zero interest when it comes to improving our quality of life together. She has made almost no effort to learn English, yet I try to learn at least some Thai. She just does not get it! I sure hope this post does not get deleted because at some point you are going to have to realize that I am a human being. Please pray for me. Things have got to change here in Thailand otherwise it is just going to be never ending CHAOS!! I'll tell ya she drives me to drink, honestly. She has this phobia of not wanting me to go outside so I spend literally 2-3 weeks just locked inside my apartment and when she closes the door to my apartment she locks the door like "You don't DARE go outside!". I swear I really do not know what to do, my eyes are spinning. I have Thai friends and they have told me that "They(I) have many friends in the same situation". You can't just keep ignoring these things or covering them up! There is some kind of nefarious element that is strong and at work in Thai society and it is deeply disturbing.
It is unbelievable and I don't know what to do. I guess grab a beer, hold on and enjoy the ride.
She does this other weird thing where she sleeps on the very edge of the bed to the point where she almost literally falls off of the bed and onto the floor, is that just totally weird or what?!!
Last edited by Name Taken on Thu Mar 03, 2016 4:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Two things. Firstly. if she is as bad as you say then it's time to change girlfriends. Secondly, you are a guest in Thailand and that means that you have to change to the Thai lifestyle and the Thai way of thinking. If you don't do that then you are as bad as all the muslims who are moving to European countries and changing them all slowly (!) from a Christian life style to a muslim lifestyle.
Big Boy wrote:I've no idea what reaction you're looking for, but I've read your post a couple of times, and each time my gut feeling was the same.....
Dump her, and move on. There are plenty of good ones out there.
I appreciate your suggestion and input, but it is not that easy to just dump her, and move on.
I don't know what to do honestly. It's like she has become colder and colder personality wise over the past 8 years we have been together. And I have a real fear of finding someone or ending up with someone that is a lot worse than her. Honestly, this is kind of embarrassing for me to be discussing but maybe it will help someone else who reads it, I don't know.
Last edited by Name Taken on Thu Mar 03, 2016 4:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Name Taken wrote:She has this phobia of not wanting me to go outside so I spend literally 2-3 weeks just locked inside my apartment and when she closes the door to my apartment she locks the door like "You don't DARE go outside!"
This is not a phobia; this is the need to control. I have seen it before in relationships here, where there is very little trust from the lady. Usually this stems from a fear that you will find someone else on a temporary or permanent basis.
My first thoughts echoed BBs, leave her, but just maybe you should convince her to first seek some medical advice. You are right to be concerned, this is not normal or rational behaviour.
"'The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why." - Mark Twain
Dump her, and move on. There are plenty of good ones out there.
She doesnt sound like the sort of girl that can be dumped easily, it would mean a serious loss of face for her.
I fear for your safety.
You better hope she doesnt have any "brothers" or "cousins" who know your address.
She has never threatened to harm me in anyway, and we rarely have an argument. I'm really not worried about my personal safety because I know she would not try to hurt me if I left her. It's an unusual situation that I don't have any experience dealing with before and it's the emotional attachment that I have with her.
Dump her, and move on. There are plenty of good ones out there.
She doesnt sound like the sort of girl that can be dumped easily, it would mean a serious loss of face for her.
I fear for your safety.
You better hope she doesnt have any "brothers" or "cousins" who know your address.
No, it probably won't be easy, but it's got to be done. Somebody quite close to me has recently escaped from somebody similar, and it was quite unpleasant for a few months. Hopefully he's got a good support network to help him through. Being imprisoned for weeks at a time is not living.
The OP needs to weigh up a few unpleasant months against a lifetime of hell.
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Name Taken wrote:
She does this other weird thing where she sleeps on the very edge of the bed to the point where she almost literally falls off of the bed and onto the floor, is that just totally weird or what?!!
Very strange. Mine does the exact opposite and takes up almost the entire bed, leaving me clinging onto the edge for dear life.