GIRLFRIEND PROBLEM

[Jockey]

Lippy - it looks like you are taking a very pragmatic and sensible view. You've obviously going to have to work out the finer details with her which will probably not be easy. Good luck.

[Farang]

This might be a troll and in this case one of the better one. However, as this thread might provide
some enlightenment and education, I consider this as a real case.

You think she's a prostitute? Why? Because she's Thai? Get a grip!

As a matter of fact it seems I am one of the few who has a very real grip on the very real world.
I am not saying she is a prostitute. If it makes you more easy I am saying that to all intents
and purposes she is a "kept woman" and very successfull at that. She made a 400K condo from her
previous cli,,, boyfriend in addition whatever other remunerations she might have got.
In case at hand she has had monthly wages for services rendered and companionship provided,
in addition to which she now is getting a a black-mail bonus of 450K. That's 19K a month!

Now, what would you call a woman not working and receiving a regular stipend from her boyfriend?
What is your term for her, please reply.

Yes VS, those are the real figures in the real world, and these things really do happen in the real world.

:::references to ivory towers and splendid isolations deleted here:::

[VincentD]

Jumps in... avoiding thrown rotten tomatoes..

This might be a troll and in this case one of the better one. However, as this thread might provide
some enlightenment and education, I consider this as a real case.

Tend to agree with Farang, I think Lippy is for real. As is his situation.

If it makes you more easy I am saying that to all intents
and purposes she is a "kept woman" and very successfull at that.

The Thai term is 'Mia Noy'. Unfortunately for Lippy she's not really the second, but a kept woman nonetheless.

She made a 400K condo from her previous cli,,, boyfriend in addition whatever other remunerations she might have got.
In case at hand she has had monthly wages for services rendered and companionship provided,
in addition to which she now is getting a a black-mail bonus of 450K.

Do I detect a pattern? I also notice her kid at 8 years of age is being educated abroad. Interesting, to say the least. I have a funny feeling that the car payoff is only the beginning.

That's 19K a month!

20K is about average for a Mia Noy.

Now, what would you call a woman not working and receiving a regular stipend from her boyfriend?
What is your term for her, please reply.

See 'Mia Noy', above.

Reading between the lines..
The girl
*Probably has a local boyfriend in Bangkok she likes very much, but he's unable to commit for various reasons. Like being married to someone else.
*Is an introvert who is only comfortable within a very small circle of people. She finds it difficult to make friends outside.
*doesn't mind, in fact prefers to be a 'kept woman'. Non-resident farangs preferred. Needs 'payoff' when said relationship grinds to a halt.
*gets upset when people don't see things her way.

Lippy
*you haven't been here long enough to know about the culture and the exceptions to it She's an exception.
*you accept too much without question, even when you have doubts about the credibility of a situation. Wake up and smell the roses.

Yes, this is going to draw a lot of flack. But I call it as I see it.
The girl's not happy in the relationship, but she's happy with the arrangement. She doesn't really want to give it up.
Lippy thinks there's a relationship, though in reality it is by his own admission an arrangement.

My advice?
Lippy, give her the 300K. Then sell the house, relocate and get another. I guess the car isn't yours any more.
The girl? She'll just find another person to fill your place. I very much doubt she went into a relationship with you with her eyes closed. Especially so when by her own admission that you're not the first farang... Doubt if you'll be the last, either.

[Jockey]

fair play to the above two posts from Farang & Vincent. A surprisingly enjoyable thread albeit on the back of semi-tragic circumstance.

One last observation - some like it hot wild n' dangerous!

Oh ... by the way ... of course I wasn't on the wind-up Dawn, whatever made you think that?

[Brit Jim]

Deleted

[Brit Jim]

Deleted!

[caller]

I think you need to consider the impact on you as a sponsor for any future visa application for any future gf if the scam comes to light.

[Kilbirnie]

Stop behaving like a pathetic wimp....

Get on the next plane to LOS and proceed as follows:

1. Grab her by the scruff of the neck
2. Beat the living hell out of her
3. Shag the arse off her
4. Give her a golden shower
5. Start beating your chest with your fists shouting out "I AM THE BOSS"
6. Run as fast as you can for the first flight home...........
7. You'll probably find she'll be there before you waiting with your slippers and a mug of cocoa.
8. Everyone lived happily everafter

[VincentD]

HELP!

Just when I thought things were running smoothly madam has just thrown a spanner in the works. She is happy with the money to finish the car and promises me this is the end!

Bullshit. It's only the beginning.

As you know I ve just sorted her a visitors visa for the UK. I have told her that I have to cancel this now as Im no longer her sponsor and as far as I m concerned its the law. When I mentioned this she went BESERK on the phone threatening to burn the house down if I go ahead. I tried to explain but she would nt listen.

If you realise that you will be breaking the law, you are. If, however, you do not cancel the visa you are still her sponsor, whether you like it or not.

She stated that she may want to visit the UK at some stage for a holiday.

She can always apply for a standard visitor's visa. You don't need to be sponsored to get one. Seeing as she did behave herself the last time, chances of her getting one on her own shouldn't be too difficult.

3. If I cancel the visa this does look bad for her future applications. This could just tip her over the edge for revenge.

No. You've just paid her off. Now you're letting her take advantage of your forgiving nature again. She shouldn't have a problem getting a standard visa unless she's had some trouble with her ex.

I am determined that I am not selling up and moving. I am prepared to take my chances and hopefully with time things will pan out ok.

Your choice.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated??

Lippy, the advice has been given. Given your situation I feel for you. Unfortunately there are no real simple solutions. If, however, you cannot, or WILL not, sever the last remaining thread, she will persist in taking advantage of you. Why? Because you let her, and will probably continue to let her.
Another problem I see further down the road is that if you ever decide to start another relationship with someone else, this is going to come back and bite you in the behind.
Sorry if I'm blunt, but as I said in my last post in this thread, I call it as I see it.
Good luck whichever way you decide to go.

[Governor]

If you decide it's better that she does not come to the UK, and you have sponsored her I would advise you to tell UK Visas at the Embassy. You need not go into to detail, just say that the relationship is no more and you will not support her during her stay. They would not cancel the visa but might have to convince an IO at the point of entry as to why she should be admitted.

As I said before you cannot cancel the Visa, but you should advise UK Visas that the relationship is no more and you would not support support her during any visit. It is her that would need to convince an Immigration Officer at the port of arrival of her intentions on arrival. UK Visas should update the warnings index file, and her details would then be available when her passport is swiped.

[matthew80]

Cancel the visa and be free of her. Even if she does burn the house down, you can always rebuild. YOU do NOT want to be LEGALLY responsible in your home country for a lady that has demonstrated instability and volitility. PERIOD! Good luck whatever you decide to do.

[matthew80]

Ok, according to Govenor, you can't cancel the visa but you can inform the authorities that you are no longer together and will not be responsible for her. That to me, if true, solves the biggest problem you have: your continual legal obligation to this woman.

[T.I.G.R.]

xxx

[Wanderlust]

Deleted

[Randy Cornhole]

Imagine if you will - she endures a 13 hour flight at great expence to her, and because you have told the authorities that you will no longer be her sponser, they turn her around and pack her straight back to Thailand. She then has to explain to all her friends why she is back so quick and still owes a lot of money. Severe loss of face...