Peter from Butterfly Rock has announced that they cannot have a nativity scene in the bar. This wasn't for any political or religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.
Good King Wenceslas phoned the Pasta Factory for a pizza. The salesgirl asked him, 'Do you want your usual? Deep pan, crisp and even?'
Santa can't come to Hua Hin. It's too hot for the reindeers and he's a fat bastr'd. Doctors tell us there are over seven million people in this world who are overweight. These, of course, are only round figures.
To remind me of home my brother sent me a huge pile of snow from Scotland. He rang me up and asked, 'Did you get my drift?'
Soi Bintabhats favourite hymn - Oh cum all ye faithful.
At Ham & Bacon and a lady expat was anxiously picking over the last few remaining turkeys in the hope of finding a large one. In desperation she called over a Thai assistant and said, 'excuse me. do these turkeys get any bigger?' 'No, madam, 'she replied, 'they're all dead.'
William Hills have called off all bets for a White Christmas in Hua Hin. There arn't enough Ferangs this high season and most of them are brown.
Happy Christmas to nearly everyone!
Christmas in Hua Hin
-
The understudy
- Ace
- Posts: 1293
- Joined: Fri Jun 13, 2003 12:16 pm
- Location: Hua Hin, Bangkok, Berlin, L. A. rotating
Santa can't come to Hua Hin. It's too hot for the reindeers and he's a fat bastr'd. Doctors tell us there are over seven million people in this world who are overweight. These, of course, are only round figures.
Jockey you forgot one thing. Airlines charge two Seats for such overly overweight People like Santa. And not only it's too Hot for them Reindeers, Santa couldn't find a decent Size Kennel to Cargo em!
Peter from Butterfly Rock has announced that they cannot have a nativity scene in the bar. This wasn't for any political or religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.
Hmmm. We can have a local Audition for the three wise Men but where to find a Virgin...?
AHappy Christmas to Y'all and everyone with no exeptions
Your's the understudy
Jockey you forgot one thing. Airlines charge two Seats for such overly overweight People like Santa. And not only it's too Hot for them Reindeers, Santa couldn't find a decent Size Kennel to Cargo em!
Peter from Butterfly Rock has announced that they cannot have a nativity scene in the bar. This wasn't for any political or religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.
Hmmm. We can have a local Audition for the three wise Men but where to find a Virgin...?
AHappy Christmas to Y'all and everyone with no exeptions
Your's the understudy
In Love with Hua Hin since 19naughty9 and it ain't fading!!!
(My fable for All Things Japanese knows no boundaries!) Proud Student of Stamford University Hua Hin Campus from 1999 to 2004 (5th Batch of Graduates.)
“Once you survive Stamford U Hua Hin Campus only you can survive anything!!!”
(My fable for All Things Japanese knows no boundaries!) Proud Student of Stamford University Hua Hin Campus from 1999 to 2004 (5th Batch of Graduates.)
“Once you survive Stamford U Hua Hin Campus only you can survive anything!!!”
Joseph and Mary have just checked in to Top Marks hotel. I went to visit but all I could talk to was a donkey (sorry Tony!) 
Barry is organising a special trip on election day. Customers need not worry about getting arrested - cruising is not an offense in Thailand.
Roses are reddish
Violets are bluish
If it weren't for Christmas
We'd all be Jewish.
~Benny Hill
Barry is organising a special trip on election day. Customers need not worry about getting arrested - cruising is not an offense in Thailand.
Roses are reddish
Violets are bluish
If it weren't for Christmas
We'd all be Jewish.
~Benny Hill
-
bozzman101
- Guru
- Posts: 669
- Joined: Sun Nov 05, 2006 9:47 pm
- Location: urainus
Dear All
My thanks to all those who have sent me emails this past year........
I must send my thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat sh*t in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet towel with every envelope that needs sealing. Also, I now have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.
I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny Brown); who is about to die in the hospital for the 1,387,258th time.
I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program .....
Or from the senior bank clerk in Nigeria who wants me to split $7 million with me for pretending to be a long lost relative of a customer who died intestate.
I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me, and St. Theresa's novena has granted my every wish.
I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.
Thanks to you, I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.
Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca-Cola because it can remove toilet stains.
I no longer can buy petrol without taking a man along to watch the car so a serial killer won't crawl in my back seat when I'm filling up.
I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.
I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore and Uzbekistan.
Thanks to you, I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big brown African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it bites my bum.
And thanks to your great advice, I can't even pick up the $ 5.00 I found dropped in the car park because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting underneath my car to grab my leg.
If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhoea will land on your head at 5:00pm this afternoon and the fleas from 12 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump.
I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbour's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's beautician.
By the way....a South American scientist after a lengthy study has discovered that people with low IQ who have infrequent sexual activity always read their e-mails with their hand on the mouse.
Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.
My thanks to all those who have sent me emails this past year........
I must send my thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat sh*t in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet towel with every envelope that needs sealing. Also, I now have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.
I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl (Penny Brown); who is about to die in the hospital for the 1,387,258th time.
I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program .....
Or from the senior bank clerk in Nigeria who wants me to split $7 million with me for pretending to be a long lost relative of a customer who died intestate.
I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me, and St. Theresa's novena has granted my every wish.
I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day.
Thanks to you, I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.
Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca-Cola because it can remove toilet stains.
I no longer can buy petrol without taking a man along to watch the car so a serial killer won't crawl in my back seat when I'm filling up.
I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a perfume sample and rob me.
I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore and Uzbekistan.
Thanks to you, I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big brown African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it bites my bum.
And thanks to your great advice, I can't even pick up the $ 5.00 I found dropped in the car park because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting underneath my car to grab my leg.
If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhoea will land on your head at 5:00pm this afternoon and the fleas from 12 camels will infest your back, causing you to grow a hairy hump.
I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my next door neighbour's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's beautician.
By the way....a South American scientist after a lengthy study has discovered that people with low IQ who have infrequent sexual activity always read their e-mails with their hand on the mouse.
Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late.
Once you go Asian you will never go Caucasian !!
