Paying a bar for a girl to leave

[GLCQuantum]

With respect, the town is full of beautiful young women who have never worked bar, and who would be more than happy to meet you.

Saying that... many of the girls that do work bar are good girls too! Difference being they just up and leave.

[dtaai-maai]

Hold on a sec here, advocate - are you seriously suggesting that it's okay to pay a bar fine for a girl and then to pay the girl for sex, but that it suddenly becomes human trafficking if you pay the bar "leaving compensation", or whatever you want to call it?

I wouldn't pay, and if she gave me anything less than the best of times, I would resume my search.

A bit picky with your principles, if you ask me...



EDIT: more posts between, but I can't now quote the whole post I'm referring to. Never mind, it's about 3 prior to this.

[Lung Per]

You would hope that the owner of the bar is going to realize that in the long term they are going to be a lot better off with a happy regular customer than trying to get 6000 bt off someone who can clearly just walk away from the situation.

A FARANG owner may see the logic. A Thai owner cannot. Thais don't think that way, the Thai mind's way of logic is money here and now.

[GLCQuantum]

At the end of the day we are in Thailand - offer the bar owner 2000/3000 baht if he gets nasty. Life is too short here to argue over such an amount. Yes it is wrong but why risk the agro if you feel this girl is worth it! Only you can make this decision but why cause both of you trouble for the sake of it. I wish you all the best.

Probably right and I agree to a point - but she doesn't work there!

Hey ho carry on Schmo.....(is what the Bar is thinking)

As a side note... if you are intending to be around/walking past said scam artist frequently it is probably better to just pay it. If not then screw it... they rarely venture out from under their rock.

[Lung Per]

Yes, I'm 30 years older.

But wiser?!

[GLCQuantum]

But wiser?!

You know, the late Chinese emperor used to meet with a 9 headed dragon at the top of a golden tower during hard times. The reason? ...To gain wisdom and receive advice from an ancient animal ( I'm sorry) in order to solve the country's problems!

Nothing wrong with growing old and oozing wisdom chaps....

Edit: Google has just squashed my childhood story - apparently it was a Cambodian King that met with said wise beast.

[advocate]

Hold on a sec here, advocate - are you seriously suggesting that it's okay to pay a bar fine for a girl and then to pay the girl for sex, but that it suddenly becomes human trafficking if you pay the bar "leaving compensation", or whatever you want to call it?

I wouldn't pay, and if she gave me anything less than the best of times, I would resume my search.

A bit picky with your principles, if you ask me...



EDIT: more posts between, but I can't now quote the whole post I'm referring to. Never mind, it's about 3 prior to this.

I have no problem with the girl being paid for her time, but how long does the bar "own" the girl. What if he barfined her 6 months ago? 1 year? She left 2 months after he did. The OP owes the bar nothing.

As far as violence goes, that can go both ways, and a smart bar owner will keep that in mind, unless he/she's Thai of course.

Regardless, it could make for some awkward moments hanging out there with her former customers. The bar is stationary, you are not, time to move on, make a fresh start, and find a different place.

[Korkenzieher]

The OP owes the bar nothing.

Absolutely agreed. It is tough really, without having a clue of which bar we are discussing (someone would have a clue about the ownership I am sure). I think sometimes that 'buying out' thing is seen as a gesture of sincerity, rather like the sinsot / dowry; but I don't know of a bar which has a formal contractual relationship with its girls and so it does seem to be either displaying her ultimate loyalties or at least hedging her bets. I can't believe if after even a few days or weeks she is so naiive as to believe that she is under some obligation just because someone has told her so. She has to be aware of what she is doing (IMHO).

I have known quite a few girls leave bars for men - including for me - and never a penny has been paid. However, I think that quite frequently the 'short term engagement' (ie, staying with you for the season, rather than leaving to build a life) probably does justify a payment. Some of the contributors here have been burned, and can offer advice and warnings. Many others will be sceptical. But in a lot of ways it comes down to just what it is that those involved think is going on, and if you are not on the same songsheet, then you need to sort that out first.

[kendo]

How i define this

If you barfine a girl, you are compensating the bar for one less host that can make patrons more comfortable and enjoy their lady time and stay in there bar spending money.In a nutshell a short term verbal and casual agreement.

Kendo.

[Big Boy]

You would hope that the owner of the bar is going to realize that in the long term they are going to be a lot better off with a happy regular customer than trying to get 6000 bt off someone who can clearly just walk away from the situation.

A FARANG owner may see the logic. A Thai owner cannot. Thais don't think that way, the Thai mind's way of logic is money here and now.

Thinking about it, that's probably the difference between the late 80s and now. Back in the late 80s, bar owners tended (in my experience) to be farang. Most Thais were too poor to even drink in a bar, let alone own one. Therefore the difference is probably Farang vs Thai thinking/logic.

[margaretcarnes]

If it was expressly agreed that if a customer took her away from the bar permanently, she would have to pay the bar owner a 'transfer fee'; and the reason she left was because you started sending her money, then the owner is probably within his rights to seek the cash.

I've not heard of this before. Sounds sensible to talk to the bar owner and find out what he/she has to say. Or just let the other 5 men giving her 10k a month take care of it.

Just kidding..

Oh dear Mr P you are assuming a far more organised operation of bar fines than happens in the real world! You are making it sound a bit like football transfer agreements. Sorry, but this situation sounds to me as if the owner has construed an excuse to try to claim a backdated fine.
Yes, true, if an agreement had been made to take the lady out of the bar permanently at the time, then an appropriate bar fine would have been made (and most bars would have a pre-agreed price for that - negotiable of course.)
But many farang send money to bar girls, and that has nothing at all to do with bar owners, and shouldn't be used as an excuse to get a bar fine out of the farang at a much later date.
If this lady has continued to work the bar for a while, regardless of any private payments from her farang, she is free to leave the bar at any time with no penalty. Providing of course that the farang paid in full while in HH.
This whole thing sounds like a bar owner trying to capitalise on the girls good fortune after the event. But it is important to remember that non of this stuff is law. It is simply custom and practice.

[JW]

A beer sounds like a good plan Lee! Cheers.

JW

[STEVE G]

.....you are assuming a far more organised operation of bar fines than happens in the real world! You are making it sound a bit like football transfer agreements.

Is there perhaps a transfer window that the bar owner was waiting for?

[Arlo]

Dear Mom and Dad. I can't wait for you to meet my new wife. I only paid 6000 baht for her.
Love your son Lee

Think about it

[Arcadian]

five pages of posts in three days, is this a record?